Bill Burr shares how he once had to perform stand-up in a college cafeteria during the middle of the day.
.27 seconds late
10/10 awesome dude
Jimmy Fallon is my high mileage crush!
Just a humble great comedian. Easily in my top 3. Love you Bill.
I love Bill burr
If your lower jaw moves from side to side—and you grind and chew your food—then you are unequivocally herbivorous. The jaws of carnivores/omnivores only move up and down, vertically. They don’t chew; they just rip and swallow. Humans sweat through their pores to cool down. We don’t pant like dogs, cats or lions to cool ourselves down. There are no claws on the human hand either, although claws are a trademark of the carnivore/omnivore. When we drive down the highway and spot a dead animal on the side of the road, I’m quite sure people don’t get excited, start to salivate, come to a screeching halt, jump out of their car, scare the crows away and start munching on the dead animal. Real carnivores/omnivores eat dead, rotting animals on the side of the road. We always cook meat before eating it, even though lions don’t have gazelle barbeques in the jungles of Africa.
To prove beyond a reasonable doubt that humans are herbivores, allow me to paraphrase author Harvey Diamond’s challenge: Place a two-year old child in a crib with a bunny rabbit and an apple. If the child eats the rabbit and plays with the apple, then I’ll eat a steak sandwich that’s been dipped in ice cream! Humans have no carnivorous/omnivorous instincts whatsoever when we’re born, young and growing up. There isn’t a speck of carnivorism nor an iota of omnivorism in us. People become inured to the taste of blood, flesh, veins, muscles, tendons, cow secretions [milk], hen-ass droppings [eggs] and bee vomit [honey] after they’re forced down our throats during childhood.
With all this physiological evidence at hand, one might wonder why many physiologists and evolutionary biologists—even the most brilliant and widely-renowned evolutionary biologists such as Richard Dawkins—would continue to indulge their addiction to meat, dairy products and eggs, and publicly rationalize their addiction in ways that wouldn’t do justice to a 13-year-old. The answer is simple and clear-cut: Scientists are human, and because humans are fallible and weak, they fall prey to addictions of all kinds. And when that happens, the rational mind, supposedly invoked to combat the addiction, usually falls by the wayside. It is only when the addict brings what he feels into accord with what he knows, his ethics into accord with the scientific facts, and the contents of his stomach into accord with the contents of his rational brain, that he can break the cycle of addiction that envelops and destroys him.
All legends suck at some point.
Billy redface on the tonight show? Oh Jeeshus
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