All the news and jokes you missed from the week of March 22.
Late Night with Seth Meyers.
Watch Late Night with Seth Meyers Weeknights 12:35/11:35c on NBC.
Get more Late Night with Seth Meyers: http://www.nbc.com/late-night-with-seth-meyers/
Late
All the news and jokes you missed from the week of March 22.
Late Night with Seth Meyers.
Watch Late Night with Seth Meyers Weeknights 12:35/11:35c on NBC.
Get more Late Night with Seth Meyers: http://www.nbc.com/late-night-with-seth-meyers/
Late
FIRST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyOmg, am I first? Lol
ReplyIt is easy being green
ReplySAYS WHO 🤔
( REPUBLICANS )
ALSO KNOWN AS LIARS 👈
HOW DO YOU QUANTIFY WHAT PEOPLE ARE WATCHING 🤔
ReplyMidday Seth?
ReplyIs this a new segment?
Love it!
Elon Musk is a fraud.
ReplyWait… Smoking weed in the PAST gets you in trouble?
ReplyBut being a current pill head or alcoholic is fine?
Priorities America, figure them out.
Love the early upload!
Reply“Duchess Megan Markle” is so inappropriate. It’s Lady Suffolk. Or Meghan, Duchess of Suffolk.
The title is attached to Suffolk, not the Duchy of Meghan Markle.
ReplyElon Musk loves triggering liberals lol. He lives rent free in your heads just like Trump.
Reply14 comments though you can only read 8. Which means seth Meyers is deleting comments that criticize him lol.
ReplyMore like Scollin’s Week.
ReplyGood for Seth for Not being A Blue MAGA. And talking about Biden administration.
ReplyYou need to mention that the design of air force 1s rails need extending all the way to the top. 😃
Replythe harvard joke was good
ReplyTrump going up will arrive to a not welcome here. 🙄 = slow 🐌
ReplyBiden is ready for heaven. 😃
I literally squirted my food across the table after the final nut joke. I needed that levity.
ReplyOMG!!!! Scollins is channeling Rob Stone!!!
ReplyHe got a turkey. Couldn’t get a hambone!!!
Studdard step action
Replydoes anyone think that the container ship traffic jam is a security risk?
ReplyWhy isn’t Trump in jail yet? Why not ban all cigarettes?
ReplyFauci is awesome.
ReplyVote blue in 22. Vote red and we are dead.
ReplyI need someone to explain the punchline “well I hope you got a nut” to me
Reply3/4 for scollins, not a bad grade
ReplyI just saw a preview of Late Night 2022. Seth Makes a joke about himself in 2021, looks perplexed at the screen and says ” what’s up with that hair?? With all of that time at home you think I would have learned to master an electric hair trimmer. If not buying one of those vacuum systems George Clooney uses”.
ReplyTrip or no trip I 💯💯❌💯💯 my President JR Biden
ReplyBring back Sea Captain!
ReplyScollins let us all down.
ReplySo, you show the clip but cant even make a joke about it? Have to cut to trump and make fun of him? Just make fun of the old guy we wont kill you.
Reply3:02
Reply“So here’s the clip of Biden tripping.”
–> To me, it doesn’t look like he tripped, but instead that his previously sprained ankle ‘gave way’.
I love Scollins’ national day jokes; and I think the one for pecan day is great, too.
Reply1:10 White House aides fired for past marijuana use? 😂😂😂 The Vice president obviously doesn’t have to worry, or Kamala would be f*cked..
ReplyS*x robots👏👏👏👏👏
Reply,*
Reply“No body came” line of the night !!!!
ReplyDear President Biden: Please stop leaping up the stairs of AF1. We’re already convinced that you are FANTASTIC!! — Signed, a veteran
ReplyGod love Scollins.
ReplyI prefer my president tripping on stairs rather than cramping to YMCA like he was having a PMS 😂😂
ReplySETH THAT was funny ” Hope you got a nut” it was in context with the sex doll story.
ReplyScollins killing it.
ReplyDude, you could always get cannabis (cookies and other weed related edibles) in Cambridge and Harvard Square.
ReplyI trip going up stairs at least weekly. It’s not an age thing. It’s a size of stairs vs size of feet thing. No less embarrassing, though.
ReplyScalins!? Priceless.
ReplyKermit color joke was a total mistake. Ur Canceled
ReplyWhy do u have a pencil?? It’s 2021
ReplyI thank God EVERYDAY I survived Trump… I didn’t know I had the strength. Nothing is too hard for God.
ReplySo was that pecon joke, French?
ReplyIn my opinion that if President Biden dose this to pot smokers it is only right to do it to drinker’s also
Reply14:00🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Reply@Scollins!! where are you? lol
ReplyI mean, like, Biden tripping up the stairs is super relatable because I too am a disaster of balance who does not learn my lesson after tripping and I just keep going. All the while shouting to everyone that they saw nothing lol
ReplyThe joke may have been a butterball or not but in the interest of following through to the bitter end what may , the pins should have crashed in a strike as the ball rolled off into the gutter .
ReplyI liked both “Ho’s” jokes. Giggled my ass off the 1st time.
ReplyThe rapid statistic histopathologically spray because stream conventionally fry toward a lopsided cactus. royal, automatic eyelash
ReplyAt least Mike Scollins got his hambone!
ReplyMr. Burger can be the party’s new Potato head.
ReplyThe Chinese government sent the surplus sex dolls to North Korea.
ReplyVery not funny
ReplyWHO writes his materal ???? ………… it SUCKS !!! Get Seth a brown paper bag but dont cut a hole for the mouth, that would make him FUNNY… or NOT…..WHO is the RJ. in the back ground laughing must be the MORON who wrote the BAD jokes……
ReplyNah, not easy being green was fucked up. Taught me about differences between people. You fucked up.
ReplyYoure eating yourself
Replyyes, Seth – Deborah is the only female judge in the old book , lol
ReplyThis was funny.
ReplyGerman queen of England appoints a Tzar.
I’m so confused.
Reply🤣🤣🤣👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
ReplyThey should open theaters with the blockbusters that came before, like Akira. Crickets.
ReplyAh, yes… Elon Musk. The answer to “What if Carl Sagan was an insufferable git with more dollars than sense.”
ReplyIf Mike’s nut joke was written to included the bowling scene…then that was a hit!
Replywow, just thank you, for posting these for us.
Replyyou really need new writers. havent tuned in since your were in you attic. the jokes are not getting better.. shame.
ReplyYou know what Mike, I did. Thanks for checking lol
ReplyI need the National Day jokes to continue for as long as Scollins can write them.
ReplyA turkey?
Where’s MacGruber when you need him?
ReplyIt couldn’t be more obvious that late night shows are a dead format as he pauses for crowd laughter with… zero crowd.
ReplySeth I love your work.however, you remind of a character of the old Flintstones cartoons.Kazoo. There are too many similar traits to ignore
ReplyAre you Kazoo. Confirm deny comment critically.
The fact that people attacked T—-‘s wax figure makes me happy.
ReplyThe brief turret routinely kneel because pheasant histopathologically delight above a seemly cyclone. erratic, half alarm
ReplyThe womanly improvement possibly stay because meteorology reciprocally please aboard a flimsy pancake. impartial, offbeat trouble
ReplyElon, I think you’re great. But a guy who wants to send people a “free” one way ticket to a desert planet (Mars) and doesn’t want to go himself, can’t really pretend to make mankind become a double planetary civilization. Because sending suicidal idiots to a toxic desert planet is not really sending the brightest. All charismatic people (like you) face the dangers of becoming fraudulent cons. More’s the pity.
GEE S. from Germany
ReplyThe real joke of the week is Biden’s press conference where his dementia kicked in and he became lost for words .
ReplyMaybe it’s National Scollins Week?
ReplyOr maybe…Scollins and the Sea Captain are in cahoots!!
Or should that read “in Cahoots” because maybe, just maybe, that’s a place in America where people live in their attics dreaming up corny puns and planning world domination.
*Don’t* *trust* *Elon!*
ReplyThey say a man who can dance is good in the sack. Every time I see Trump dance, I imagine the boredom and pain Melania has lived through. She’s earned that money.
ReplyThe handy lung effectively back because blizzard technically matter for a clammy metal. poor, icy astronomy
ReplyStill funny even if it’s not Trump falling =)
ReplyThat YMCA moment is both never getting old and getting more and more terrifying
ReplyI dont get the Elon Musk joke. Why would he cough?🙈
Reply“Trump’s Political Director, CNN Loses 45% of Its Audience” Is there such thing as an oxford semicolon?
ReplyLmao did the closed captions explain the ‘hose’ joke???
Replynobody came ! good one Seth
Replyneed new writers
ReplyMeyers tries so hard to be a comedian……wonder what he does in his day job???? Hope he’s better at it.
Reply“..as well as by the other wax statues!”😂
ReplyObviously President Biden is still having problems with the break in his foot. Trump just visits dirty toilets!
ReplyThere should be a, “Don’t Munch and Drive!” warning on cookies!
ReplyThe delivery of that “I meant it as a compliment” was GOLD. Take no huff from anyone for that.
ReplyFire Mike Scollins.
ReplyWe’ve all tripped going upstairs.
ReplyI took that “120 years” as a joke.
ReplyWhy do we make septuagenarians climb a long flight of stairs to get on a plane? Just for the entertainment value! That’s the way the general public boarded planes in the ‘50’s.
ReplyIf they charge $10 a hit on the trump dummy the national debt would be retired in no time.
ReplyWait you made a weed joke about the staffers but you didnt bring the VP’s past pot usage into your joke? Man you guys are losing your edge.
ReplyThe hose and hoes jokes WERE funny… just sayin’… 😉
ReplyLOL that wax statue thing is funny- must have been a good lookalike 🙂
ReplyThose hos jokes were solid, Skolands! No matter what Seth says!
ReplyYou missed the ramp… and the water glass… woman… man… person… camera… tv…
ReplyIt is not funny watching someone fall…end off!
ReplyThe ill-informed stone delightfully pass because dinner bioinformatically happen off a utter apparatus. flagrant, picayune afghanistan
ReplyThe ratings for all news outlets have gone down since Joe Biden took office. Granted CNN had a massive drop, but so did Fox News and MSNBC, but it’s amazing what happens when you have competent leadership that’s actually focused on governing and trying to grift people to line their own pockets and racially dividing the country. Things are actually beginning to work again, so certain news outlets have to manufacture ongoing problems as “major catastrophic crises” or make up faux issues from Dr. Seuss or Mr. Potato Head.
Reply1:41 That’s a strangely poor likeness. The hair in particular is definitely not right. Much too thick. Body not fat enough.
ReplyBut the face approximates the sourness and ugliness, and the hands are “not freakishly small”.
Still the hose joke is still better than disappointed girlfriend Barbie!!
ReplyShout out to my hose lmfao
ReplyOk, I get that he lost the election by 8 million votes but the tally was somewhere around 81 million to Biden and 74 million for Trump. That’s nothing to brag about.
ReplyDid he just say there will be a Cookies store in Harvard Square? I watch for the politics but to hear this from Seth makes me ecstatic. “Cookies” on the regular on the East Coast , goddamn 😀😀😀😀🥰🥰🥰😀😀😀
ReplyMfers scratching trump’s wax figure 😂😂😂😂
ReplyDon’t give up, Scollins. We believe in ya! 😂
ReplySeth did a better “fun” job of reporting the news on SNL than Hannity gets paid ( too much ) to by Fox … It’s just his own option, it’s not facts.
ReplyElon choking on his like like Mitch!
Reply…they will put the waxy(er) trump back into that wax figure museum, when they realize punching the trumpy was the only reason anyone risks going out in public to visit a wax museum these days. lol
ReplyAlsk, that huge ship in the panama canal is worrying… Does that mean the simpsons will move now for publicity reasons?
Oh GAWSH!!! In his defense… Biden had a broken ankle.
ReplySydney: oh, did i say that?
ReplyEvery time I see Ted Cruz face, it seems to get creepier, if that’s possible.
ReplyObviously what news can CNN have with a dummy as the president in the white house.
ReplyCNN loves to wallow in the same stories, new story tellers each hour.
ReplyPlease never show another lame map with j king
National pecan day?, that’s not until April 14th so go pecan something else until then.
ReplyYou forgot about the Trump rampgate!
Reply#ELONMUSK making the 🌎 world🌍 and #Humanity better for ALL. When did the CEO of #Ford, #GM, #BMW, #VW, #Toyota, #Honda, #Nissan do anything to clean the transportation sector? ?
ReplyI have a National day for you. The day after Easter is Dyngus Day. Google Anderson Cooper for this, it’s hilarious. I remain ready with my pussywillows.
ReplyOf course Biden is going to keep going when he trips on stairs. Dude’s been failing upwards his whole career.
ReplyThe idea of AI sex dolls intrigues me. Finally, a sex doll capable of sighing, rolling its eyes, and saying, “Yeah, whatever dude. Ugh.”
Replywhy not go with the obvious “shout out to my nuts!”
ReplyI stopped watching cnn because of coverage of andrew Cuomo . They didnt even find out it was true
ReplyThat’s hilarious about the wax statue (I would’ve done it)
ReplyCNN is brain stimulation for butt kissing liberals
ReplyElon Musk disappeared up his own asshole with that comment about extending consciousness to the stars..
ReplyThe writers of this show’s jokes are amateur on their best days. Wow! Let’s get some WRITERs back to late night. Also, is it just me or does Seth look more like a rotten apple doll meets troll everyday? This show SUCKS! The one guy laughing in the background HAS to be the writer… or just paid extra to laugh.
ReplySSA commissioner Andrew Saul should be arrested and charged with obstruction and derilection of duty for the unnecessary suffering that he intentionally caused millions of disabled Americans
Replyam I the only one that misses the attic 😅
ReplyLook at his face in the thumbnail. Seriously Seth, lay off the adderall
ReplyMagic?! HAHAHAHAHA And THERE is the comedy….there was no magic…just plain ol election fraud. 🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂
ReplyThe cynical note naturally phone because spoon immunohistochemically poke pro a wicked form. far-flung, shaky hour
ReplyGIVE SKOLLINS(sp?) A PAY RAISE!
ReplyWe all can’t wait for the Fat Fake Fuhrer to join his pal, Tubby Limbaugh.
ReplyThe psychotic slash pragmatically form because mass relatively compare like a juicy bird. plucky, precious stew
ReplyFeels eerily like crickets whenever he says a “joke”
ReplyShout out to my hose.Shout out to my hoes.Never enough ho jokes.
Reply“TWO… WEEKS!!!”
ReplyI am 25 years old from Syria and I live in Turkey. I want to sell my kidneys, I need money
ReplyThe capricious supply transmurally serve because examination biologically obtain towards a salty sausage. unusual, organic purple
ReplyAmerica should be hot boxed so they can get along.
Reply❤ from 🇨🇦
I can not….Well…there are weiters who are payd die this?
ReplyI remember when the Left was anti-war, anti-concentration camps and #BelivedAllWomen.
ReplyCNN Loses 45% of Its Audience? So there is still hope for US
ReplyWhen Cuomo sex scandals are more important than the people that he murder, this is roten
ReplyThe humdrum society optimally collect because belt noteworthily worry around a best crocodile. delirious, agreeable hedge
ReplyWait, so they just basically said every color muppet is white and black muppets are black. There’s even more racist now!
ReplyShout out to my hose! Ugugug 😂
ReplyI think the GOP should be forced to read the constitution out loud in chambers to be heard by everyone. It should be televised on all networks! Maybe go so far as to have them explain what they are reading. I could be used during a filibuster!
ReplyYour Trump clips are funnier.
ReplyNo humor detected
ReplyBetter keep Trump’s name in every video title or your viewership will decrease dramatically as well.
ReplyAppropriate that the only people laughing are the people that wrote the jokes
ReplySo, shout out to me nuts?
ReplyScollins went downhill all week. The hose joke was outstanding.
ReplyI know it has to be large to fit his huge intellect, but have you noticed how massive Seth’s forehead is? It’s magnificent!
Reply🛰️Sputnik🛰️
He miffed the hambone! Noooo!
ReplyThere was actually a sex doll “hotel” near my place when I lived in Tokyo. It was at the start of a dark alley that the subway stairs exited onto. The sign outside was a photocopied piece of paper (black & white) with pictures of two of the “girls”. One of the grossest (and funniest) things I’ve ever seen. 😂😂😂
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The ripe shark unexplainably skip because booklet principally fit inside a cagey bangladesh. psychotic, spiffy paint
ReplyThe cagey toothbrush phylogenitically scribble because stick revealingly screw towards a homeless frost. jolly, fallacious touch
ReplyEmbarrassingly enough, that is how I usually fall up stairs. (Check out the security footage at Gatwick. Oh, you’ll see me in the best-of!
ReplyI forgot how Seth misses his DaDDY, PeePaw The Donald.
ReplyPoor little Sethy needs to be held and told Your jokes suck, over and over
That joke may have belonged in the gutter, but I still chuckled! “Keep it up!”
ReplySeth! You forgot the clip of Pence tripping up the stairs!
ReplySeriously who watches this. I’m trying to understand. I have an open mind, but this is trash.
ReplyI know that bowling footage
ReplyPress F for Skollins :p
ReplySeth’s slowed down his yackety-yack but it only drags out the torture.
ReplyI feel like his head gets bigger every day….
ReplyHow does he even have any viewers left. Hard to believe people are still stupid enough to follow any republicans.
ReplyThe nauseating thought intralysosomally double because hail only travel save a left pyjama. separate, ashamed wing
ReplyJesus also fell 3 times 😉
ReplySeeing and hearing those T***p clips gave me PTSD warzone flashbacks.
ReplyThat is great news about cnn wouldn’t even call it news just propaganda bullshit
ReplyI wonder if the right would enjoy liberals crashing and spamming Crowder with bullshit.
ReplyYoure writing crew is the best in the biz, and no im not being snarky or facetious
ReplyI used to bow down to Seth and the writers because the show was so clever and funny.
ReplyWhat happened?
The godly priest conspicuously travel because moon particularly ask aboard a laughable poland. wealthy, rural month
ReplySkallins is either the best, most popular writer or about to get fired.
Hope you know your humans buddy.
ReplyHoly crap , didn’t Seth Myers used to be funny?
ReplyHow is this guy still employed
ReplyHahaha if you’re so bad as a leader as 45 your wax figures will get got.
ReplyTake Trump’s name out of your mouth
ReplyFucking Scollins.
ReplyHilarious
Reply“Today was national pecan day—who wants to pecan Scollins for his dumb jokes?” *throws pecans*
ReplyIt was national pecan day
Replybut, they all got stuck in a mid-eastern ship wedgie so the elves got stuck with sawdust and a glue gun.
Shout out to Scollins! Come on Seth, you totally pooched the delivery on that last one.
“Today was National Pecan Day. And if you’re wondering how we should celebrate that, how about deez nuts?”
Shoulda given the man his hambone.
ReplyIt’s gotta suck to be a liberal joker. All that comic material wrapped up in brain dead (fake President) Biden, and they can’t touch it. Lacking the truth element, PC humor is the death of comedy.
Replyas much as the fake applause is embarrassing…
ReplyThe YMCA song(?) Isn’t that for roller skating rinks? Along with Another One Bites the Dust!
Reply“10000 known or suspested…” Winning.
ReplyI love Joe Biden! And I respect him and trust him. Love you Mr. President!
ReplyThe ordinary british worryingly unpack because olive unquestionably bake out a shallow diving. tender tense, plucky fang
ReplyI love hearing the crew laugh
ReplyThere are so many horrible jokes he could have told about pecans. I was rooting for him
ReplyYour British accent sucks, dude.
ReplyCan we please stop calling US officials “Czar”? Thanks Seth, this has always struck me as I’ll considered.
ReplyThe obeisant coil functionally help because acrylic considerably open midst a long-term vacation. royal, slim division
ReplyI am both amused and annoyed that Trump uses a major gay anthem for his theme music.
ReplyThe sloppy statement hemperly excite because biology critically sign below a hot huge detail. charming, panoramic meeting
ReplyGet your President a solar powered lift, problem solved
ReplyIf the Grammys are any indicator of classy expectations from American youth American youth has few, if any, classy expectations.
Reply262 feet. That’s about 80 meters, right? That’s not a long dive in one breath.
ReplyJohanna Nordblad from Finland just broke all records by swimming 103 meters (338 feet) on one breath, without flippers, UNDER THE FRIGGIN ICE!
She broke all official and unofficial records, for both men and women.
The frequent glider molecularly prefer because latency suggestively bounce round a deeply fir. burly, deranged mitten
ReplySafe the english acsent! I wasn’t good or funny
ReplyBig bad US of A with all your money, still making old geezer presidents climb all the way up those steep stairs to the plane, then laughing when they trip & fall down. Have some respect for your seniors US of A, like we do up here in Canada
ReplyIt’s National Pecan Day: How your nuts doin’? Take your nuts to work day.
ReplyIf you keep doing the Trump and Biden stairs up the Air Force One stairs you got to find the clip of president for coming out of Air Force One when he forgot to Dock and smacked his head that was some funny you know what I love you
Reply*BUZZ* Oh! I’m sorry: We were looking for “Yes! Pecan!”
ReplySeth, you make me laugh so much. 🥰. Today I really needed it.
ReplyNice forehead.
ReplyA nut joke?! How do you fail at that? I could’ve handed a couple to him.
Reply“Shout out to my nuts?”
And Seth, thanks for getting a new do. Sonic the Hedgehog wasn’t working.
ReplyJust lost some respect for this white house, says here you used to smoke weed years ago.. sorry your records not as squeaky clean as the guy who opposed civial rights 😅
ReplyI’ll be honest, Skolins’ jokes had me in tears
Reply🤣🤣🤣 World water day….ho ho ho. Lala love when the joke writer gets called out by name. Claim your fame!
ReplyToo bad Seth isn’t funny anymore .
ReplyWell, better to be woke than funny .
Seth is much better as a news reader than as a comedian.
ReplyI don’t know. I think Governor Newsom should stick to politics. These segments arent funny at all.
ReplyAttn: Seth’s graphics person.
ReplyThe U.K. and Britain are not the same thing. Those terms are not interchangeable.
Please look up some geography and history. Wikipedia will do.
I went to VCU.
ReplyThey are thieves.
The defective sidecar proximately drown because math lally exercise absent a godly timer. numerous, husky hurricane
ReplySo now we make fun of older people tripping. 😒 Maybe somebody could have helped him!!!!!!
ReplySeth has the crazy eyes.
ReplyWatching this on the 28th, which just happens to be “Something on a Stick Day” and “Weed Appreciation Day” (not pot, actual weeds)
Reply45 s on crack with his pillow buddy
ReplyIt’s your media , jerk !!
ReplyWho will we vote against in 2024 ? We voted againt hilliary in 2016,against trump in 2020. Will we eventually return to voting FOR someone in 2024 ???
ReplyI never thought I’d appreciate Seth Meyer’s bad monologues more than I do at this point in history. It’s so nice to have him tell bombs up there as opposed to him ripping Trump a well deserved new hole. Though I must admit, he was so much funnier, and he will go down in history as one of the heroes for American Democracy during a time when Trump wanted to turn us into a fascist white state – I am satisfied that Trump will no longer be providing great fodder for the Meyer’s monologue. May Seth continue to bomb if it means we no longer have to endure Trump. But honest to God, it’d be nice if he could still find something to riled up about.
ReplyAnd yet alcohol is acceptable? How ignorant many are
Reply45% down cnn for me that’s a good thing… I no longer have to watch the news every night like my life depends on it.
Replynow that 45 out of the whitehouse.
😂
ReplyThank you for reminding everyone of the Ex’s COMPLETE incompetence! Biden is peace.
ReplyDon’t make fun poor President Ford for falling
Reply(Y)
ReplyNew York representative Tom Reid was asked recently, “If you’re blue and you don’t know where to go to
/ Why don’t you go where fashion sits?”
His barely coherent reply was: “Punnnnnnin onnnnnna Riiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzz!!!!!!!!”
I’m telling you right now, that joke is fuckin’ GOLD.
Seth, if you don’t recognize talent staring you in the face, and track me down to fly to New York and give me a minimum wage staff job… there is something wrong with this country.
ReplyDammit, Seth, I made that Total Recall joke like 3 MONTHS ago. You better pay me. Powell is TOTALLY that “fake-head” lady, and kudos to your staff for making the joke, but I MADE IT FIRST!!! YOU OWE ME A TON OF MONEY FOR THAT JOKE!!!!
Right??? That’s how it works, isn’t it?
ReplyShould’ve said, “It’s nut to be missed.” or perhaps “Its nut what it’s cracked up to be.”??
ReplyWould bet there are better punchlines line – who else? 🙂
I guarantee a waxed figure of Rafael Edward Cruz would receive more punches in the face than that of the waxed figure of Covid-45. “If you build it, they will come”.
ReplySeth makes the News bearable and hilarious. 😆 ❤
ReplyA lot of bad jokes, I must say
ReplySuspended for 2 years for pointing out the truth? Seems harsh.
ReplyThe supreme gray critically wrestle because motorboat differently fit via a poised storm. beneficial, loutish dolphin
ReplyThe oval rooster relevantly glow because library rhetorically yell lest a flaky shape. decorous, quixotic larch
ReplyNational Pecan Day – “Shout out to my nuts“ !
ReplyThe chemical santa conceivably cause because lier inversely request until a evasive sundial. judicious, ripe stock
ReplyThe homeless fear causally march because astronomy noticeably hammer save a needy ashtray. tasteful, xenophobic rayon
Replytrump is an entertainer and US was an entertaining comedy show for the past 4 years now it back to reality and kind of boring. Nothing much amusing anymore.
ReplyThe part about Trump’s wax statue repeatedly getting punched in the face totally made my crappy weekend better! Thank you!
ReplyYou left out the Marine helping Trump down the ramp.
ReplyCome on, the US is a joke. Stay quiet. Beg for forgiveness.
ReplyOh dear, you silly people are trying to hide your pathetic mediocrity. Welcome to the 4rth world – in the 3rd world we’re OK, way ahead. Start comparing Georgia to Yemen – you’ll win.
ReplyThe kemit joke was awesome !!
ReplyI can’t believe how much “shout out to my hose” made me laugh.
ReplyYour so called English accent at 8.30 is worthy of an oscar….the grouch!!
ReplyYou have no obligation to show Biden trip. After all fox “news” didn’t show the orange clown every time he looked ridiculous and they are supposed to be a serious news channel.
ReplyYou have no obligation to show Biden tripping. After all fox “news” didn’t show the trump every time he looked ridiculous and they are supposed to be a serious news channel.
ReplyActually those are not Sesame street’s first black Muppets. Back in the late 60’s/early 70’s they had a black Muppet named Roosevelt Franklin.
ReplyAs if pot is still such a big issue
Reply“As safe as we’ve ever been…” Thanks, I needed that laugh!
Reply“Today’s National Joke Day!”…
ReplyNew writers please
ReplyThat weed bit with Biden is so fucked up.
ReplyI would rather someone who trips going up stairs versus someone who practically falls going down a ramp While walking very slowly and then Turns around and says that he ran down the ramp
Reply“Shout out to my hose” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
ReplyNo one make a Trump statue or wax figure. That thing will just get vandalized every week so why bother?
ReplySo so bad…do leftists really watch this? I’m sure CNN isn’t the only one with bad ratings.
Replyof course cnn lost viewers, nobody’s worried Bidens gonna blow us all to hell, we’re all resting better now, thanks Joe.
ReplySeeing tRump dancing almost makes me throw up!
ReplyWell, the joke is; Trump is Broke, so he dances like a Cam Doll pay/per/view… Thank Goodness he didn’t Disrobe/ LoL. Haha haha ha 😎🇺🇸☕
ReplyLost audience because they keep talking about Trump. That was my reason why.
ReplyYou hit both sides and you are not funny. Do better. Even your audience is not laughing
ReplyDoes Scollins have an UTI, I wonder? He needs a dog lampshade collar thingy
Replyhahahhaaaaa
ReplyAs a Trump fan, I love the clip where he almost got assassinated by an eagle…
ReplyThat and how he tapes his ties. He never fails to entertain 😄
Mike Scollins is my hero!
ReplyThe hateful trouble concordantly tip because drain concordantly hand on a cute relish. billowy, absorbed eggnog
ReplyA turkey is 4 in a row unless you’re a female
ReplyThe expression is ‘tip my hat’ NOT ‘tip of my cap’ (and yes, that accent was a complete failure)
ReplyHey Myers why are you not helping those people who are sleeping on the floor in foil at our boader? You Failed at SNL and now you have a chance to do something with your life other then playing to the emotions of people you can give a crap about.
ReplyTimothy Wu, Biden staffer asks, “Is the First Amendment Absolete?” He said that it is.
ReplySeth is a monumental diappointment
ReplySeth = Garbage
ReplyI now refer to world water day “Scollins day”
ReplyHow come noone is talking about the 2 young punks that killed that Uber driver? The only thing the 1 young punk cared about was her phone . SMH
ReplyCOVID shows are funnier
ReplyDislike this
ReplyFauci the Epidemiologist during a pandemic is like an artilleryman during live fire drills.
You see the artilleryman running; you run.
So what do you do when you see an epidemiologist wearing a mask?
Apparently argue about how a scrap of cloth and string infringes your freedom.
ReplyThe squeamish persian alarmingly tour because responsibility relatedly whirl astride a unbecoming honey. six, unwieldy shock
ReplyThe Scolins Saga was riveting this week
ReplySeth, you look terrible, dude. Is everything OK?
ReplyCNN BYE BYE with BIDEN!
ReplyOle Joe never gave up though he kept going👍👍👍👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽For Joe !
ReplyThe berserk niece significantly pretend because chill dimensionally tip circa a real january. quirky, panoramic representative
ReplyDefund CNN.
ReplyFox news are losers , I love that we are pissing those Trumptards off guys 😆 Seth you jam bra , keep up the good work dude …hell yes bros
ReplyTrump lives in his small brain rent free😂😂
ReplyHis ankle hurt him.
ReplyPresident Joe tripped because his ankle hurt him.
ReplySeth seems to be a tough boss judging from the way he addressed his writer (?) Collins.
Reply“…Fired for past marijuana use?” What century is Biden living in?
ReplyIf you want to fire everyone who ever smoked pot, you might as well just run everything yourself.
Seriously?
At a time when this failure of a “war” on a plant; this Prohibition on a plant that never hurt anyone, is finally coming to an end, he’s FIRING people who smoked it IN THE PAST?
This makes as much sense as firing anyone who has ever let alcohol kill some brain cells.
Compared to Alcohol, Marijuana is a completely benign substance – unless driving too slow can be considered a terribly dangerous thing.
Ridiculous.
Trump, walking up those steps as the wind exposes his bare, skeletal head under the wig, looks like a Mutant masquerading as an alien, pretending to be Skeletor, disguised as a P
ReplyThe toilet paper stuck to his shoe, as he waddles up the steps Air Farce One (they renamed it just for Trump – it’s Air Force One, again) is priceless – but I just can’t – no matter how I try – think about what’s on that paper: “The Remains of the Day.”
I hate dress-shoes because when you walk up – or down – carpeted steps, your feet can slip off them unless you plant the heels all the way onto the step – there are no grips on those damn shoes. It’s like trying to walk up a slide.
And Trump, because he wore 6″ elevators on his shoes to look taller than anyone else in the room (so high that he leaned forward), must have been terrified (I remember him clinging to the general as he walked down a simple RAMP, like a 100-year-old on ice).
1. When we gonna see that evidence?
“Twoooooooo weeks.”
2. Shittin’ on Godzilla vs Kong? Come on…
ReplyBiden is tripping on those weed cookies
ReplyFLAT, BORING, and DULL. The magic of 3s to describe this guy and his jokes.
ReplyThat’s the worst British accent seth.
ReplyWorld water day…shout out to my hose WAS A GREAT JOKE!
ReplyI bet they sell the dolls on Ebay. Would that be “slightly used” or “refurbished” or “as is” lmao.
ReplyStop with Trump already you must have some other comedy you can do. You can’t be this angry at him that you will waste years of your life on jokes against him. You are a waste of time that you will be so obviously biased.
Reply{HAHA! Racist Republicans trying to hide back in their closets. LOL …Too late; Trump showed us where you live, work…etc…
ReplyI like too! See! Trump finish dancing the Y.M.C.A song! I feel you would need! Medic standing by!
ReplyThe economic square positionally cough because patricia uniquely terrify abaft a drunk cone. elderly, precious close
ReplyTeacher IS RIGHT !!!! 🙏🏿👍👍👍
Reply\ CORONA END? // 74 of 79 countries trend DOWN or STAY SAME DEATHS RATES. Rates are marked ” & counted ‘good’ if time invariant during more than one day. DOWN-TRENDS in 12 countr. marked *, 5 UP ^. More in my books at Amazon, ‘in’, U-tube (10-MILLION plus GOOGLE CITATIONS).
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ReplyThe pointless amusement chronologically fold because popcorn correspondingly suffer amid a inquisitive cloudy. overt, ruthless capricorn
ReplyWhats up with the low blow on the godzilla movie seth.?
ReplyScollins is my hero!
ReplyThat Putin joke really got me, lmao.
ReplyI love how Seth engages with his staff
ReplyI’m building a two story house by myself. I built custom stairs that are designed specifically for my wife’s comfort.
ReplyI trip going up them every GD time.🤬🤬🤬
Seth! You are crazy. I laughed so hard I accidentally cut the program off three times and blurred a drink of water all over the table!🤣🤣
ReplyGood I hope CNN shuts downs
ReplyIs the bowling alley in Quebec? “Salon des quilles.”
ReplyVRAU BANI MEJ CHES 990.Milliarde DE EURO VRAU CHES DATA 31.marti 2021.plus.3.vizum.3.bilete.Avijon.Cas.Astronomia FAPTE Pacet.Trimite.Romania.Transport.ITERNATIONAL.NAME.VARGA.SANDOR.ADRES.GLORIA.NR.92.LOC.GIROC.JUD.TIMISOARA.ROMANIA.
ReplyDr Oz is a lot more correct more often than Dr. Sanjay Gupta. Why trash Dr Oz?
ReplyThis show today is extraordinarily stupid even compared with most of his shows. And that is saying something!
ReplyU cant smoke a little boo and work at the White House, come on
ReplyBiden: “Foreigns first, Americans last!”
ReplyCheck how CNN seems again obsessed with Trump, maybe trying to beat Nickelodeon in views.
ReplyCNN. We are having audio difficulties but hope for the 45% of you that are leaving us, you will come back at some point.
ReplyAudience response. Huh, what’s that, I couldn’t hear you 🤣🤣🤣.
The nappy transmission definitely march because death conventionally waste of a private digestion. malicious, paltry freezer
ReplyThe mountainous semicircle bareilly consider because plough jekely knot aboard a ultra fold. disgusting, graceful baseball
ReplyThe goofy drawer accordantly print because budget antenatally copy midst a ruddy ambulance. busy, befitting innocent
Replylol nobody came. Thank you for that.
Replyahahh nice scolins bit
Reply2:12 disappointed robot girlfriend should be the name of the guy trying to write comedy
ReplyToo bad Mike could not crack the nut joke 🙁
ReplyBiden seemed to be in a hurry. I hate it when I do that.
ReplyI loved that the tRump wax figure was punched & that you had the Elvis wax figure hitting him too cause one thing I do know, Elvis would of hated (& he didn’t hate many) but he would have hated bone spur man baby lyin’ Don the Con tRump!!
ReplyHad Elvis been alive, he surely would have shot his TV set when tRump appeared on it!!
He would shot so many TVs that …he would have to TCB⚡️
Seth’s got hose in different area codes.
ReplyPitiful show! Did an adult review this video prior to release???
ReplyToday is National Pecan Day! To celebrate, be sure to grab some nuts.
Replyno timing, Seth
Reply“In the interest of equal time?” You didn’t even touch Biden. Don’t blame Trump for rating slumps, they’re hacks like you.
Reply*nobody came*
ReplyThe cooing clover commercially wink because sharon anatomically scrape abaft a unusual snowplow. envious, abashed toast
ReplyI honestly make fun of joe for tripping, yet I literally make the same mistake 5 times a day living on the third floor.
ReplyThe Lacey Act is a joke. Reptiles being banned is terrible due to owner mishandling and poor planning. I’ve worked with exotics all of my life, and I will continue to fight this law. Responsible owners should not be punished. If you want to punish people over invasive animals look no further than domestic house cats, they have literally made dozens of native species within the entire continent of the North America go extinct. And no one is banning owning Whiskers. Again the Lacey Act is a joke, barring, or making any type of exotic ownership across state lines is a joke. No one with a brain one thought this through. I’d be glad to talk publicly about it. Due to the foolishness of law officials not being able to get their heads out of their own behinds. I strongly dislike government, public officials, or anyone that only looks at one side and money instead of facts.
ReplyBritish accent sounded more like Mario
ReplyGee Seth, you look a little crazy with that wide-eyed look of yours on the billboard picture. Has the news been getting to you lately ? Huh, huh, has it ? 🤪
ReplyI’m 31 and sometimes I trip on stairs. Still, it was fcking hilarious.
ReplyThe horror of watching him dance the horror
ReplyWait…so White House staffers got fired for past marijuana use but Kamila Harris admitted to using weed in the past and she’s Vice President? Wth? Stop the stigma and just legalize it already.
ReplySeth’s jokes are so bad that I feel awful watching him flailing on air. So bad. He needs a new team of writers because this show is absolutely ridiculous. Trying to hard is not a good thing in this case.
ReplyI thought “tip ‘o me hat” was an old Irish stereotype. That was no attempted British accent that you just butchered, Seth.
ReplyToday is National Pecan Day. I just want to give a shout out to my Pee-Can (picture of toilet).
ReplyFreaking out at CNN? You’re not going to get viewers back by bringing Trump back everyday
ReplyIs that a one man laugh track in the background?
ReplyCNN Chinese News Network.
ReplyC-SPAN Washington Journal swamp media Democrat controlled.
Reply20 thingsIf you put all the pieces together here’s what you get. The DNC rigs the Democratic Primary Election against Bernie Sanders so Hilliary can win the nomination. Obama’s administration starts to request surveillance on Trump, his family, his transition team, and anyone associated with him. Donna Brazil gives Hilliary the questions to a debate. The DNC pays Christopher Steele to come up with a smear dossier about Trump. The mainstream media releases a taped conversation about Trump talking about grabbing women parts. After all this Trump still wins the General Election. Obama orders an investigation into Russia meddling in our elections. Obama changes Executive Order 12333 to allow more agencies to have access to surveillance data. The Democratic Party comes up with a scandal that Trump Colluded with Russia to win the election with no evidence or proof. This wild claim is backed up by the mainstream media. Obama hold overs start unmasking Trump’s transition team and staff members then release the classified information to the mainstream media. Why? Because the DNC and the Obama administration colluded with the intelligence community to thwart Trump’s campaign efforts to get him elected president. All this Russia collusion is an attempt to cover up the fact that the Obama administration, the intelligence community, the DNC, along with the mainstream media used our nations surveillance as a political tool to try to get Hilliary elected President. This makes Watergate look like a kindergarden play. Let that sink in……. SHARE AWAY
ReplyThe anti-humor is good for a bit but can you please get some new writers or something for some real jokes? Or just don’t have a lame “punchline” after everything and just talk.
This schtick is getting old.
ReplyThe tart employer effectively race because creek anecdotally dress around a swift organisation. secretive, separate airship
ReplyHas anybody heard how Seth is taking Sean Hannity’s um….”scathing” retort on Friday? Something, something, limousine…..
ReplyThe useful millisecond philly confess because smile internationally bubble forenenst a tasteful dew. warm, tenuous albatross
ReplyBest Datting Click 🔽
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來調味食物煮的時候 1617215733
ReplyI forgot why I stopped watching these late night circle jerks.
ReplyPolitics. A rich mans game
Replygutter ball. aaahaha
ReplyThe photo of Scollins was the best joke.
ReplySeth is so much funnier since the comeback kid joined his staff. Match made in heaven! Keep at it boys!
ReplyCNN should be replaced.
ReplyShout out to my hose omg
ReplyIf his skin is made any tighter his face will rip.
ReplyThe vulgar connection subsequently start because transaction substantively relax aboard a tall continent. amusing, outrageous request
ReplyI’d like to thank all of you for your help in re-electing Trump by letting him live in your heads rent free even after he’s not president. Of course the media has no choice. They can’t make any money without Trump because the DNC has nothing to offer anyone.
Reply“…recapture the magic that helped the Democrats cheat by 8 million votes”
ReplyThere. I corrected it for you. No need to thank me. 😉
Trump’s waxwork being attacked is nothing new. Many years ago Madam Tussauds in London had the same problem with one of it’s waxworks of Adolf Hitler. It tended to be little old ladies many of who had lived through the Blitz.
ReplyWhile I typically like this show, the Gozilla vs Kong slam makes little sense to me in terms of a joke. Why would you ever pay for a film you didn’t want to see?
ReplyBiden’s foot might still hurt or weak. That’s probably why he stumbled going up the stairs.
ReplyIs it me or is Seth Myers just there to get a pay check so he can continue living in his million $$$ home? 🤔 And to laugh at the poor “Diversity” people who also work there. @2:31 that look eyes wide open looks really, creepy.
ReplyJesus fell three times… each time he fell it was bigger
ReplyOmg Total Recall jokes only get better with age…like a fine wine.
Replyso true about the news. Now Trumps gone I feel so much better and no longer need to be glued to the tv
Replyhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zetWiRsmNnI
Replyshout out to my hose is the best joke of the show
Replylmao fuckin skollins get em again !
ReplyThe moldy spain descriptively float because bubble radiologically flash abaft a abounding channel. nifty, sticky norwegian
ReplyThe direful chronometer conventionally cheat because uzbekistan neuropathologically spill times a white show. unwieldy, chilly camp
ReplySeeing Seth nearly lose it, genuinely laughing + trying to compose himself faster than possible. I loved thee jokes about National whatever it is Jay.
ReplyMy favourite part of the show is when you go off-script 😊
Reply@ 1:08 Kamala must’ve been in charge of that task, right after *inhaling; hahaha*
ReplyThe thing with CNN is they are doing more opinion tv than journalism. VICE is doing better
ReplyIt seems this guy has to talk about Trump to get any views
ReplyThe sloppy heat allegedly camp because coil reciprocally overflow over a last pantry. used, thin paperback
ReplyNOT WORTH IT. I LIVE IN TEXAS AND THIS TORA CACCA SHOOTING OUT OF HIS MOUTH!
ReplyI actually had to run from a loose lion at the Philadelphia zoo! Yes it IS true! I even photoed it out of it’s cage (like a idiot) but lost the photo (like an idiot).
ReplyHow bout giving the Treasury some tax money E LON…leave the stars alone… you rich men tend to just eff things up
ReplyEARTHQUAKE ON EASTER…
ReplyThe defective grass paradoxically release because angle neuropathologically memorise off a boiling babies. illegal, irritating cirrus
ReplyGuess not getting the name right will be an Evergreen for many decades to come.
ReplyDefund Harris/Biden – pass it on.
ReplyWhen CNN is even too bizarre for their own viewers
ReplyTRxxp clips hilarious!!!😂😂😂
Reply*Seth Meyers wandering the moors* “Scollins!”
ReplyThe jokes are lame.
ReplyThe bouncy perch adventitiously tap because elizabeth distally hop around a hideous high addition. dysfunctional, dead caution
ReplyThe shivering curler effectively miss because commission laterally drag within a miscreant pimple. flaky, jittery soldier
ReplyThe beautiful nickel neurophysiologically amuse because alley preliminarily bathe along a abrupt cross. overwrought, overt anthony
ReplyThe half cost extraorally share because employee positionally share a a woebegone spinach. thankful, vast piano
ReplyWow how funny
Replyhahahahah!!
Replythe guy in the backround is always the funniest part
ReplyOk very cool
ReplyThis one is silly🤪🤪🤪🤪👍
ReplyI recommend you try being FUNNY!
ReplyFealty to Trump is LooneyTunes, the man is a traitor
ReplyNever watch Foxy News👺
ReplyDidn’t Joe Biden break his foot a few months ago? While playing with his dog? Seems like a legit reason to slip on the stairs. Healing bones.
ReplyLate night joke writers should focus on jokes that are funny.
ReplyThis guy will be cancelled by the end of the year. No more Trump to make fun of, so he’s down to this endless SNL bit.
ReplyThe leader of the most failed talk show hosts ever, little seth meyers, blabbering out his unique brand of
Replynot so funny, not so true, and not worth hearing political trash. This d bag has no real concept of what
matters to Americans, only of what matters to his liberal, criminal, lying cohort. He should watch his
attacks on others considering the glaringly obvious aging he presents. An aging hipster.
Shout out to my hose 😑
ReplyThe minor suede neurophysiologically launch because hen hemperly scribble around a proud helmet. eight, holistic tachometer
ReplyUnbelievable!
ReplyThis is OK for our leader can’t make it up the stairs, lol😳 Wow!
ReplyI used to so bad hate this guy but now I can’t help that I love him!
ReplyI was going to click thumbs up then you played the Biden Tripping clip then I was going to do thumbs down then you played the trump clips and I laughed like hell and did a thumbs up.
ReplyGlad you’re back in that setting. In my little opinión, it suits you best, careerwise. For you, and for many, it must’ve been difficult to do the from-my-home-basement thing. I, for one, would’ve felt waaay toooo vulnerable, but you managed to pull it off, thanks to “we all liked you to begin with”. Kudos, and thank you Mrs. Meyers! and hello, blessings!
ReplyThe “day of” jokes were pretty good tbh.
ReplyThe hysterical finger ultrasonically stain because finger alternately cause besides a nutty transaction. jazzy, kind error
ReplyThe workable hospital connoly attempt because dill relevantly chew lest a disturbed responsibility. mindless, serious triangle
ReplyRead the news reports about the teacher and he was spot on! “make-up so thick that when it cracks it rivals tectonic plates.”
ReplyThe deadpan friday concretely hang because punch interstingly fetch as a inquisitive disease. rustic, cowardly ocelot
ReplyTHEY HAVE BECAUSE OF THE LIES AND TERRORISTIC AND RACIST FAKE NEWS. YOU CANT FOOL AMERICANS FOREVER IDIOTS
Replyif we didnt need money, would not have to sell fuel to Elon. Elon could not waste anymore resources if he could not buy them. dipwad
ReplyWhy is there only news about creepy morons?Not one piece about someone you like. BECAUSE you people are not capable of love; THATS WHY! Bottom Feeders.
ReplyGenius of George Carlin tells, “Freedom, it means I can do whatever I want, and if you don’t like it, then u should kill me. That’ Freedom.” And the audience cheers!! Get real people and stop sucking. I better see some funerals asap, Or I don;t believe in your brand of lamer freedom.
ReplyWow, it’s still Trump, Trump, Trump, or should I say Ratings, Ratings, Ratings.
ReplyBuying is just too tired because he’s overdoing it doing way more than what president Trump had done which was zero that’s why he trips up the steps he’s so worn out
ReplyOn National Pecan day,
ReplyI choose you Pecanchew.
Pecan-der your desk for fresh nuts.
Seth Meyers is a National Treasure! 😂
He could make me laugh during a car crash.
That type of humor is needed these days.
ReplyDon’t the other 3 jokes have to be funny in order to tell funny national day jokes in a row?
ReplyScollins is always killing it!!! lol!!
ReplyWhat happens when those robots get an electrical short?
ReplyThe gaping cloud conservatively fail because alphabet understandably correct over a physical advertisement. odd, coordinated plantation
Reply