The Dirty Dossier Gets Salacious

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Published on March 24, 2018

The ‘Fox & Friends’ hosts routinely call the Steele dossier ‘the dirty dossier.’ They have NO idea.

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20 comments

  • TheVideoGamingChannel 7 months ago

    first!

    Reply
  • Karan Singh 7 months ago

    2

    Reply
  • Fade Nissan 7 months ago

    The dirty dossier Fox and friends🖕🏽🖕🏽😂🤣😂

    Reply
  • Ferdinand Stilling 7 months ago

    not first

    Reply
  • Samuel Frew 7 months ago

    Crikey.

    Reply
  • Ahmad Khan 7 months ago

    “get her done”

    Reply
  • yashiWinchester 7 months ago

    Well done editing team, well done 🤣🤣

    Reply
  • jay foreman 7 months ago

    Cold blooooded!

    Reply
  • Paul Berevoescu 7 months ago

    LAAAAAAAAAAAME

    Reply
  • Fox 7 months ago

    Dirty Donald… Can we call him that?

    Reply
  • Guillermo St 7 months ago

    & friends…
    Nice touch, fits like a glove.

    Reply
  • Todd Taliaferro 7 months ago

    Fox News is so far from reality it’s not even funny. I spent several hours watching it the other day and I couldn’t believe it. It was just one lie after another.
    They’re misleading people so badly and it’s wrong, wrong, wrong.
    So here’s my idea of retaliation…

    Trump’s “University” was a scam
    It put Trump once more in a jam
    Sure, Donald’s reptilian
    But twenty-five million
    Makes even rich bastards go “Damn!”

    McMaster done sealed his own fate
    By bad-mouthing Donald’s soul mate
    Though his words were true
    Trump gave him the screw
    Which helps make America great

    Trump’s secret is Putin’s paid trolls
    Their propaganda fooled the polls
    With Trump’s sneaky lies
    They tricked the unwise
    Who still choose to act like assholes

    Without any apprehension
    Trump screwed McCabe out of his pension
    He never gets tired
    Of saying “you’re fired”
    Or increasing national tension

    Said Donald, “I just had to try it”
    So Stormy got paid to be quiet
    Republicans blamed her
    Evangelists shamed her
    Trump did what he does — he denied it

    Controlling guns seems a lost cause
    The NRA writes its own laws
    Trump plans to do naught
    ‘Cause his ass is bought
    It’s an endless parade of last straws

    Of Putin no ill has Trump spoken
    Such words anyway would be token
    As Trump’s critics know
    His bluster’s for show
    Vlad’s end would leave Donald heartbroken

    What sort of man needs a parade?
    Is this moron in the fourth grade?
    His hour of fun
    Will cost US a ton
    It won’t be his money that’s paid

    An ass-kissing Fox shill named Hannity
    Takes pleasure in stroking Trump’s vanity
    His audience buys
    Each one of Trump’s lies
    Thus perpetuating insanity

    Not clapping for Trump is now treason
    A big deal to him for some reason
    He’s so full of crap
    Why bother to clap?
    With luck he’ll be gone by next season

    Republicans say we’re unfair
    For laughing at Donald Trump’s hair
    That orange cotton candy
    He thinks looks so dandy
    Came straight from the New York State Fair

    “What sanctions?” Trump asked insincerely
    “The Russians are our allies, clearly
    Obama’s just jealous
    Of me and the fellas
    ‘Cause we love the Motherland dearly”

    Now that the memo’s released
    And all of the screaming has ceased
    Those four little pages
    That seemed so outrageous
    Have gone from “the worst” to “the least.”

    Melania hated her life
    She didn’t like being Trump’s wife
    To deal with the man
    She thought up a plan
    Involving scotch, roofies and a knife

    While styling his coiffure last May
    Trump wondered if he might be gay
    So he stuck his thumb
    Deep into his bum
    And there it remains to this day

    Trump met a young girl named Melania
    They went out to dine on lasagna
    He plied her with liquor
    And told her, “Eat quicker,
    By seven I plan to be on ya”

    One evening while roaming the White House
    Trump wondered if he had the right house
    Melania said “Hey,
    If I had my way
    We’d live in an Uglegorsk lighthouse”

    “My daughter is gorgeous” Trump said
    “I can’t get her out of my head
    That tight, sexy body –
    God damn, she’s a hottie!
    And one day I’ll get her in bed”

    While driving his daughter to school
    Trump farted and felt like a fool
    Ivanka said “Dad,
    It really is bad
    I’ll just walk from here if that’s cool”

    What’s up with Sean Hannity’s hair?
    Did he mean to put his part there?
    The way that it’s cut
    It looks like a butt
    I bet little kids point and stare

    Some leaders like to educate
    While others just pontificate
    But ol’ Trump is sly
    And I’ll tell you why
    His secret is to obfuscate

    Our president promised a wall
    The neighbors would pay for it all
    But when it came time
    To show us the dime
    All Trump could do was just stall

    A well-to-do nitwit named Trump
    Was a liar, a thief and a chump
    He said “Yes I’m rich,
    The son of a bitch,
    My real name’s actually Drumpf

    Keebler Elf Jeffy Sessions
    Had style that just begged bad impressions
    In courtroom confusion
    He copped to collusion
    Which led to more heartfelt confessions

    There once was a VP named Pence
    Whose passion for God was intense
    He called his wife “Mother”
    Had eyes for no other
    And lacked but one thing: common sense

    A filthy rich fat guy named Trump
    Saw his pageant beginning to slump
    His beauty queen cried
    Trump took it in stride
    And canned her when she became plump

    Trump likes to watch hookers go pee pee
    The sparkle and warmth thrills him deeply
    Some may think it’s funny
    To pee pee for money
    But most people think it’s just creepy

    Stress made Devin Nunes get sick
    Trump told him, “This should do the trick”
    “Hey wait,” Devin cried
    “That’s pure cyanide!”
    “Don’t worry,” Trump said, “It works quick.”

    “Those bastards have me in a fix,”
    Trump whined, “Democrats are all dicks
    I’m useless, they say
    ‘Cause I sleep all day
    Please move your hand faster, Ms Hicks”

    Trump’s ass was in trouble, no doubt
    He prayed to his god “Help me out”
    But Trump’s god is money
    (and this part is funny)
    It turns out that cash has no clout

    Republican voters must wonder
    What sort of a spell are they under?
    Fox News says Trump’s cool
    But he’s Putin’s tool
    Should we have to pay for their blunder?

    When Trump was a boy his dad knew
    He’d grow up to be a prick, too
    Dad said “Cheat your vendors,
    Don’t pay back your lenders
    And know that all women want you”

    One morning while thinking up lies
    Trump got an unpleasant surprise
    The ones he deceived
    No longer believed
    They told him “We hate long goodbyes”

    Nunes cried wolf once too often
    With lies even Trump couldn’t soften
    So what’s Devin worth
    While in Leavenworth?
    Substantially less in his coffin

    American presidents vary
    This new one’s a little bit scary
    He lies like a rug
    And steals like a thug
    You think he’s dishonest? Yes, very.

    The world thinks we’re wimpy,” Trump claims
    “We need yuuuge parades and war games
    The world’s gotta see
    We’re tough, just like me
    Now please finish wiping me, James”

    We can’t keep on going this way
    Our plight seems more desperate each day
    I think we all know
    That Trump’s got to go
    There’s just no time left to delay

    Because he was honest and wise,
    George Washington never told lies
    But now Trump’s the guy
    And his lies are why
    All over the world he’s despised

    Trump’s doc says he’s fit as a fiddle
    But I think he’s fudging a little
    No doc talks like that
    Plus Trump’s crazy fat
    Too fat for a framework that brittle

    All of the president’s men
    Run out of mean tricks now and then
    Trump chides them, “You jerks,
    Just go with what works:
    Investigate Clinton again!”

    Trump’s mindless supporters don’t know
    Their hero’s tough act’s just for show
    He not only cries
    When critics crack wise,
    He pouts when his way things don’t go.

    The closer we get to the facts
    The more freakin’ guilty Trump acts
    He thinks we’re all dumb
    And under his thumb
    I hope that I’m there when he cracks

    Trump tries to pretend he’s not nuts
    His clan plays along for tax cuts
    And Putin’s web trolls
    Still act like assholes
    From far off (cuz they got no guts)

    Trump’s guilty of serious crimes
    A fact that’s been proved many times
    His fans are insistent:
    It’s all non-existent
    “Fake news” as one voice the mob chimes

    Trump just can’t be bothered with laws
    He scoffs the Emoluments Clause
    Though most folks suspect him
    The brain dead protect him
    At most we’ve got probable cause

    Kim Jong Un and Trump should be friends
    Upon them our future depends
    They both have weird hair
    But clearly don’t care
    They’re focussed on how the world ends

    Trump’s lawyer makes violent threats
    A ploy that’s as wrong as it gets
    He should be on guard
    He could get disbarred
    Then Stormy would have no regrets

    Reply
  • Benmore Peak 7 months ago

    The Dirty Dennison Gets Impeached.

    Reply
  • Zephyrus Auron 7 months ago

    This show has now fully embraced YouTube. Only a true dank master could do this!

    Reply
  • Coffee is for closers 7 months ago

    The Dirty Dossier get your tickets now.

    Reply
  • Nava Chetia 7 months ago

    Salacious. WOW I am working on a joke with the word salacious

    Reply
  • Jeremy Toh 7 months ago

    Hilarious 😂

    Reply
  • baddmanaz 7 months ago

    Watch till the very end

    Reply
  • 1kparmar 7 months ago

    Fox news watchers. They still worship Trump and he can do no wrong. Speaking on chat to these nutters, and really they are. They see no bad about Trump, simple choosing not to see the baffoon in front of their eyes. US, you are in serous trouble, before I can understand (not really but still), now you are in serious trouble. Get out and vote, drag people to the voting booth if you have to. It’s really a question of he will win another term, if you don’t. Crush them in the mid terms coming, and it might avert a total disaster. Good luck, and don’t want to be you.

    Reply
  • A Wee Scots Dog 7 months ago

    Something else to add to the dirty dossier…

    Intimacy – And so … The Dance of Love Begins

    As she showered so as to tease her brand new date
    Building up the excitement by making him wait
    It made him pace, he was edgy
    His sweating gave him a wedgie
    So, tenderly, he called out “let me in to mate!”

    Reply

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