The Avengers Respond To Marvel Movie Critics

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Published on October 26, 2019

You’re right, Hulk. The “Godfather” films do glorify violence. #Colbert #LSSC #ColdOpens

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20 comments

  • A Wee Scots Dog 7 months ago

    Moscow Mitch “El Wrangle Low” McConnell and Don I Tell All
    (Aka Putin’s Chin-ja Turtles)

    Down deep in the sewers there skulks
    Strange mutants that think they are hulks
    But though they are furtive
    They always feel hurt if
    Light shines upon their massive bulks

    Despite having an outer shell
    It does not hold up very well
    When exposed to the weight
    Of the questions they hate
    Like “are there truths that you can tell?”

    So they work out for hours and hours
    To exercise their super powers
    Of always being relaxed
    About things Putin’s hacked
    (Or infernos or meetings in towers)

    Now McConnell’s not handsome like Shrek
    Though he has an incredible neck
    That we’d all like to wring
    To hear this turtle sing
    While Don “I’ll Sell All” sanctions a wreck

    Actually, it was Iraq that Trump sanctioned. He meant to sanction Iran but geography, and geopolitics … and most things, aren’t his strongest suit.

    His strongest suit is the double stitched tailored outfit with the built in iron girdle and super absorbent diplomacy diaper that he wears to all his meetings with Putin. It’s high-tech aroma dissipation technology is designed to neutralise the smell of fear.

    Unfortunately, for Trump, Putin is a Ninth Dan at reading body language (of which there is plenty when Trump wears that suit).

    Reply
  • Christopher Floody 7 months ago

    This just feels like a publicity stunt from Scorsese and Coppla. The Marvel movies aren’t the most wondrous pieces of cinema, but they are good. I mean, why dont they critique the Fast and Furious franchise? They’re even worse movies

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  • vasant SP 7 months ago

    Black panther roasted the hell out of scorcesi.

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  • CountBifford 7 months ago

    True, the Marvel movies aren’t high-brow cinema.

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  • jmmerk 7 months ago

    Coppola directed Captain EO and Scorsese voiced a character in Shark Tale. They both can pipe the fuck down.

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  • Secular Guy 7 months ago

    Marvel’s like the junk food of movies. They’re made to appeal to the masses, but there’s very little of real substance to them.
    They’re pretty boring and they age really quickly. The first few already feel dated. Yet films like The Godfather are five decades old, and still popular.

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  • Nisharga Nirjan 7 months ago

    Black panther part was savage!!

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  • Russell Nathan Gwinn 7 months ago

    Well to be fair marvel movies can be a little tiresome. I mean it’s like if a director made gangster movies every five years featuring the same actors and a bunch of voiceover…

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  • specialpatrolgroup92 7 months ago

    I was in a coma by the end of the godfather it was so miserable and boring. People like different things.

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  • Hannes Größlinger 7 months ago

    The only teenage avenger complains about the taste of wine!

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  • Dave Smith 7 months ago

    Cinema is whatever everybody wants it to be, not what Scorcese dictates it to be. From my point of view I can’t tell the difference between the Marvel movies and anything else that comes out of Hollywood, Scorcese included. At least the Marvel movies never pretend to be realistic.

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  • Na M 7 months ago

    Anything that isn’t a reboot, remake, sequel, prequel, or somehow attached to a powerful film franchise, is, quite frankly, profitless trash. (AKA Art)

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  • Adrian Duran 7 months ago

    the Avengers characters don’t understand the gangster films because they are about the Mafia, but they only know about the Maggia

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  • Napoleon I Bonaparte 7 months ago

    What does he say of DC though?

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  • Minister E H 7 months ago

    ???????????

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  • Ganiscol 7 months ago

    Different blokes, different strokes.

    The winners are those who can appreciate the full spectrum of cinema

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  • J T 7 months ago

    Only millenials with a lot of grow up to do can seriously think superhero movies are a fine and intelligent form of art

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  • Contevent 7 months ago

    Marvels are like the westerns back in the day, except there are less of them. For a time there was a different western in cinema almost every week.
    The funny part is watching it evolve. From what I know, we got from classic westerns with hard men killing for honor, swooning women, and lots of racism, to spaghetti westerns which ditched reality and treated the far west as some mythological thing, and then the post-westerns, where we got back our hard men but in a civilization that caught them up and where they cling to relevance or die from their past sins.
    The X-men went this way in their franchise, they establishes the codes of super hero movies, became kinda parodies of themselves, sometimes entertaining sometimes not, and then produced a movie like Logan, in which our hero is caught up by civilization and clings to relevance or die for their past sins.

    However Marvel tries to keep the same formula. There are oddballs but as a whole it didn’t change much in structure or message. This stagnation is interesting to observe, both in itself and on the effect it has on the public and the creators.
    A post Marvel movie may look like a movie in which the heroes are not needed anymore, or treated like criminals ad vigilante. It would be possible in a future where super technology like Stark’s or Wakanda’s are readily available and special teams are formed to deal with particularly impressive threats to order and public safety, instead of lone super heroes forced to go against the rules of a world too small for them. This time, the world would swallow them, and worse, it could be a good thing.
    I very much doubt we’ll get this movie, but it would be awesome to see ^^

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  • Et x 7 months ago

    the black panther scene about scorsese not having any blacks isnt true although there should be more minorities in all of cinema. marvel chairman is the largest donor to trump.

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  • Space-Cadet David 'Spanky Bonespurs' Dennison : 7 months ago

    Scorsese & Coppola are just jealous because they haven’t made a story saga that spans a 23-film cinematic universe (and broke box office records along the way).

    Reply

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