Seth’s Favorite Jokes of the Week: Bob Woodward’s Trump Book, Buffalo Wild Wings

Published on September 11, 2020

Seth’s favorite jokes from the week of September 7.

Late Night with Seth Meyers.

Watch Late Night with Seth Meyers Weeknights 12:35/11:35c on NBC.

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  • Dramatic Eyeball 2 years ago


  • Newtotown 88 2 years ago

    Scroll down 👇🏽 👀 to find out:

    *whispers* Trump’s gonna win.

  • ConTroller 2 years ago

    No one can capture A picture of something they bring into light without capturing its shadow. A dream come through that Trump is stuck and unable to change subject while melting in the sun. There is no place like home everyone. It’s time to click hills.
    Biden Harris 2020

  • Richard Owens 2 years ago

    That was an epic list of people who think Trump is the wrong guy for the job!

  • Colombianito 1985 2 years ago

    Scroll down 👇🏽 👀 to find out:

    *whispers* Trump’s gonna win.

  • DazzlingDavidoff 2 years ago

    My favorite joke of the week is that 9/11 was an outside job

  • S1L3NT G4M3R 2 years ago


  • Msrcx 1989 2 years ago

    Scroll down 👇🏽 👀 to find out:

    *whispers* Trump’s gonna win.

  • China Bill 2 years ago

    To the kind American people that’s reading this。You are unique and likable, stay happy and healthy during this pandemic,bless you.
    I am from China, my dream is to reach 10k. I been struggling to get there.

  • ThE DuCk 2 years ago

    Trump’s reelection campaign is such a turd Trump’s gonna have to vote for himself twice !

  • Rick Blaine 2 years ago

    Seth changes shirts quicker than a Melania smile.

  • Red Pill 2 years ago

    There is no difference between fascist republicans and fascist corporate democrats. Both are for every single war. Both are against health care for all Americans. Both are against merit based tuition instead of the current class based education system. Both are against universal basic income during the pandemic. Both are against housing the homeless.There is no substantial policy difference between the 2.

    “The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything.”― Albert Einstein

    “Civil disobedience becomes a sacred duty when the state becomes lawless or corrupt.”
    — Mahatma Gandhi

    “Are you a communist?”
    “No I am an anti-fascist”
    “For a long time?”
    “Since I have understood fascism.”
    — Ernest Hemingway

    “When Fascism came into power, most people were unprepared, both theoretically and practically. They were unable to believe that man could exhibit such propensities for evil, such lust for power, such disregard for the rights of the weak …” — Erich Fromm

    “We are nonviolent with people who are nonviolent with us.” – Malcolm X

    ”In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.” – George Orwell

    “If…the machine of government…is of such a nature that it requires you to be the agent of injustice to another, then, I say, break the law.”
    — Henry David Thoreau

    ”The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who during times of great moral crisis maintained their neutrality.” — Dante Alighieri

    “When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross.”
    — Sinclair Lewis

    “The principle of self-defense, even involving weapons and bloodshed, has never been condemned, even by Gandhi.” – Martin Luther King, Jr.

    “There’s only one basic principle of self-defense. You must apply the most effective weapon, as soon as possible, to the most vulnerable target.” – Bruce Lee

    “It is forbidden to kill; therefore all murderers are punished—unless they kill in large numbers and to the sound of trumpets.” — Voltaire

    “I don’t even call it violence when it’s in self defense; I call it intelligence.” – Malcolm X

    “Self defense is not just a set of techniques; it’s a state of mind, and it begins with the belief that you are worth defending.” – Rorion Gracie

    “The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.”
    — Henry Kissinger

    “We can either have democracy in this country or we can have great wealth concentrated in the hands of a few, but we cannot have both.”
    — Justice Louis D. Brandeis

    “Concerning nonviolence, it is criminal to teach a man not to defend himself when he is the constant victim of brutal attacks.” – Malcolm X

    “As long as ‘security’ continues to justify the banning and dispersion of demonstrations, assemblies, and encampments, it serves the decimation of democratic rights and democracy itself.” — Judith Butler

    “ … their propaganda is marked by its extreme contempt for facts as such, for in their opinion fact depends entirely on the power of man who can fabricate it.” — Hannah Arendt

    “We must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military industrial complex” – President Dwight D. Eisenhower

    “A fascist is one whose lust for money or power is combined with such an intensity of intolerance toward those of other races, parties, classes, religions, cultures, regions or nations as to make him ruthless in his use of deceit or violence to attain his ends.” — Henry Wallace

    “Fifty-one percent of a nation can establish a totalitarian regime, suppress minorities and still remain democratic.” — Erik von Kuehnelt-Leddihn

  • New Message 2 years ago

    Ok. I’ll say it.

    I miss the Sea Captain.

  • Tanya Silva 2 years ago

    Anyone want to be my Boyfriend 😍💋 💝💖♥️❤️

  • jj 767 2 years ago

    Seth you are the joke of the week and this day forward…… TRUMP 2020

  • hudsongrrl 2 years ago

    To effectively hide secret message, encode it in a porno movie after the 5 minute mark… took me a second before I got it. LOLOLOL

  • julian clark 2 years ago

    Well suggestable mindless morons, Biden wants to send your young men and women off to fight a few more useless wars. You no longer have to put on the “I am a good person, because I love everybody and I art better than thou” nonsense, get into your “war is Good” mindset.

  • Don Device 2 years ago

    I have to finally come out And say what I wanted to when the joke was initially aired:

    The idea of being able to hide something on porn after the five minute mark really dates your writers more than a lot of the things you usually use as jokes about to the comedic generation gap, Grampa Seth.

    It didnt even just become dated with the, ahem, coming of the Blu Ray, but with that effort of the DVD, to name two,more formats that have since erm, ‘arrived’ a,D the more or less gone since the day when the logic of that joke worked for those who care about that sort of tomfoolery without the aid of a little blue pill…. a

    Indeed, it has been at least 20 good years (not counting , of course, those with Orange Julius Caesar– who would doubtless get your joke in an instant, btw– so there’s that!) since the idea that a VHS tape would be stopped after 5 minutes of pizza delivery hijinxp, and no one would go further.

    People now (let’s just pretend blurays are still all the rage, shall We?) just skip to the parts they like. They don’t just watch the beginning and give up, Get off and get out.

    Sorry to bum you grandpa’s out.

  • Nellie Kirby 2 years ago

    Good. I wait for love from you 💝💖

  • kedari9057 2 years ago

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