Presidential Candidate Tim Calhoun (Will Forte)

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44 comments

  • NilmeX 1 year ago

    Lol 41 sec ago Sub kappa

    Reply
  • Josher Heng 1 year ago

    FIRST

    Reply
  • Annomoyuos Person 1 year ago

    Third

    Reply
  • al-hazeem 1 year ago

    i clicked this soo fast loooool

    Reply
  • Jessie Kneeae 1 year ago

    lmfg

    Reply
  • goku gameing 1 year ago

    2ent

    Reply
  • Benjamin Skellie 1 year ago

    4th

    Reply
  • daniel davila 1 year ago

    yes not last this time

    Reply
  • Aley Kastrophy 1 year ago

    have Gary Johnson or Jill Stein on

    Reply
  • Nuwayrah Gaibie 1 year ago

    ?Jimmy Fallon???

    Reply
  • CedXify 1 year ago

    Looks like his Wharmpees Beer company went well

    Reply
  • Maria Β 1 year ago

    Jimmy’s reactions were exactly my reactions!! ??

    Reply
  • Stranger Than Fiction 1 year ago

    14th! uhhh i guess im not cool now

    Reply
  • Burnt Waffles Jack 1 year ago

    First socialist

    Reply
  • Happy Time Vincent 1 year ago

    6th

    Reply
  • Believiv 1 year ago

    hey, can you guys help me get 10 subs? :)

    Reply
  • omer7464 1 year ago

    Better than Clinton and Trump

    Reply
  • Denisse Rosales 1 year ago

    Wow ??…
    Jimmy ????????
    Hahahaha Jimmy ?…
    ???????,???
    Of 2016

    Reply
  • Brenton Bolderoff 1 year ago

    You know you could’ve used your late show to go use and actually have…. a
    3rd party candidate who’s actually going to be in the general election…

    Reply
  • Ilyas Mohamed 1 year ago

    Fuck donald trump

    Reply
  • Patrick Hill 1 year ago

    Kobe!

    Reply
  • Tyler Darko 1 year ago

    Well played sir

    Reply
  • Gunner Robinson 1 year ago

    my dad beats me

    Reply
  • Ilyas Mohamed 1 year ago

    Ima put this in a nice way and a mean way first is the mean way

    Reply
  • Ilyas Mohamed 1 year ago

    Fuck Donald Trump
    Fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, nigga, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, nigga, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, yeah, fuck Donald Trump, yeah

    [Verse 1 – YG:]
    I like white folks, but I don’t like you
    All the niggas in the hood wanna fight you
    Surprised El Chapo ain’t tried to snipe you
    Surprised the Nation of Islam ain’t tried to find you
    Have a rally out in L.A., we gon fuck it up
    Home of the Rodney King riot, we don’t give a fuck
    Black students, ejected from your rally, what?
    I’m ready to go right now, your racist ass did too much
    I’m bout to turn Black Panther
    Don’t let Donald Trump win, that nigga cancer
    He too rich, he ain’t got the answers
    He can’t make decisions for this country, he gon crash us
    No, we can’t be a slave for him
    He got me appreciating Obama way more
    Hey Donald, and everyone that follows
    You gave us your reason to be President, but we hate yours

    [Chorus – YG:]
    Fuck Donald Trump
    Fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, nigga, fuck Donald Trump
    I don’t like your ass, nigga
    Yeah, yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    I really don’t like you, nigga!
    Yeah, fuck Donald Trump
    Yeah, nigga, fuck Donald Trump
    This for my grandma!
    Yeah, yeah, fuck Donald Trump, yeah

    [Verse 2 – Nipsey Hu$$le:]
    Nigga am I tripping? Let me know
    I thought all that Donald Trump bullshit was a joke
    Know what they say when rich niggas go broke
    Look, Reagan sold coke, Obama sold hope
    Donald Trump spent his trust fund money on the vote
    I’m from a place where you prolly can’t go
    Speaking for some people that you prolly ain’t know
    It’s pressure built up and it’s prolly gong blow
    And if we say go then they’re prolly gong go
    You vote Trump then you’re prolly on dope
    And if you like me then you prolly ain’t know
    And if you been to jail you can prolly still vote
    We let this nigga win, we gong prolly feel broke
    You built walls? We gong prolly dig holes
    And if your ass do win, you gong prolly get smoked
    Fuck nigga, fuck you!

    [Interlude – Donald Trump:]
    I will build a great, great wall on our southern border
    And I will have Mexico pay for that wall. Mark my words

    [Verse 3 – YG & Nipsey Hu$$le:]
    Hold up, I fuck with Mexicans, got a plug with Mexicans
    Want a little, need a switch, who I call? A Mexican
    This Comedy Central ass nigga couldn’t be the President
    Hold up, Nip, tell the world how you fuck with Mexicans
    It wouldn’t be the USA without Mexicans
    And if it’s time to team up, shit, let’s begin
    Black love, brown pride in the sets again
    White people feel the same as my next to kin
    If we let this nigga win, God bless the kids
    God bless the kids, this nigga wicked and wigged
    When me and Nip link, that’s Bloods and Crips
    Where your L.A. rally? We gon crash your shit

    Reply
  • Ilyas Mohamed 1 year ago

    Now is the nice way

    Reply
  • Ilyas Mohamed 1 year ago

    Boonaa Mohammed MENU
    HomePoetry VideosTerror Is…
    TERROR IS…

    November 24, 2015Category: Education, Entertainment
    ISIS is terrorism, I think everybody can agree
    And what ISIS does in the name of Islam, does not represent me
    And I will never defend their actions because a cause does not justify a
    means
    They have manipulated something so beautiful, for their own political
    schemes
    But ISIS are not the first major terrorists to emerge onto the world scene
    Because the war against Islam, is nothing more than a war of political
    ideology
    But a critical look at history can reveal so much about this evil mess
    And since we are on the topic terrorism, let us first define what terror is

    If it is violence, fear, and intimidation placed upon a nation
    To achieve a political, religious or social goal through aggravation
    Then aren’t western nations, more guilty of these exact same allegations
    Considering the long list of offenses that have taken place in the name of
    liberation

    And I’m no conspiracy theorist but I’m still waiting for all the facts on
    building 7
    Cause 9/11 opened the floodgates of hate, for a crime that only a few
    committed
    But if you ask me, this stage was already set long before Osama bin Laden
    Cause there is always been the need for an enemy, otherwise the good guys
    wouldn’t see any action

    So I’m not surprised when these bigots try and offend me by drawing my
    prophet’s image
    Cause these are a people who come from a history of intolerance, racism and
    oppression
    Our governments are not allowed to advertise tobacco, because they say that
    it kills
    But yet they defend the freedom to advertise hatred, as though it is ideal

    And they will do it in Jesus name, as if to say Jesus would do the same
    But didn’t you say that Jesus said to turn the other cheek, please stop
    playing these silly games
    Cause Terror is, Christian fundamentalist bombing abortion clinics
    And white Christians burning black churches even though they are from the
    same religion
    But where are all the moderate Christian voices who will stand up and shout
    Not in my name, every time another deranged loner goes postal on his route
    Cause it’s OK for the KKK to still fully operate and not just in the south
    But I guess it makes sense when your founding father were racist slave
    owners, check your past if you’re in doubt

    Cause when ISIS burns people alive, the whole world should feel remorse
    But when White Americans burned black people alive; they turned it into a
    national sport
    Gathering their kids together so they can laugh at the strange dangling
    fruit
    The genocide of countless African Muslims, from servitude to Human Zoos
    Yes, those were mainly Muslims you enslaved, and you even gave them
    Christian names
    You stripped them of their history, and taught them how to be ashamed
    You say you’re so scared of sharia law, but you’re a nation full of prisons
    Incarcerated your slaves once again to work for pennies so you’re chillin
    And what’s the point of a black man in a white house if he still run it by
    massa’s rules
    Cause if ISIS represents true terrorism, then what the hell does your
    history make you?

    And Canada, Oh Canada, who could forget about you
    Abducting aboriginal children from their homes and forcing them inside your
    brainwashing schools
    And now we have Thanksgiving Day, as though we should be giving thanks to
    you
    For Africville in Nova Scotia, and the dead Chinese workers who built the
    railway that we still use

    And the French have some audacity to claim they are the champions of human
    rights
    After they turned 1.5 million humans into martyrs in Algeria overnight
    People who decided they didn’t want to laugh at their Masters jokes anymore
    So they cut open pregnant women to see if she was to have a girl or a boy

    How much does brown blood cost, what is the value of human life
    When Bashar kills us by day; and Israel kills us by night
    Or shouldn’t Palestinians be offered the same basic human rights
    Or do Holocaust survivors call for the same holocaust they had to fight
    Terror is the 1948 exodus of men, women and kids
    Who were forced to leave their homes in Palestine to make way for Zionist
    terrorists
    Armed with western backative and fake UN resolutions
    Forcing us to wander in the desert like Pharaoh did to Musa

    Cause when white people play monopoly, they take it to a whole different
    level
    Trading nations like properties, and carving up borders over dinner
    Everything from the Spanish in the Philippines, to the Dutch in Indonesia
    From the aborigines in Australia, to CIA installed dictators in Latin
    America
    To the Portuguese in Brazil, to the Italians in Ethiopia
    From the Germans in Tanzania, to the creation of Rhodesia

    Stolen wealth and immoral trade is what helped make Britain so great
    But Why would God save the queen, when she’s been spreading mischief since
    before 1858
    Terror is, the murder of Indians, through the orchestrated famine in Bengal
    To the plantations in the Caribbean, stealing Africans right from their
    homes
    Or for the Kenyan people, why don’t we tell the world of British law
    Like the tools that they invented to crush and then rip your testicles off
    Cause if we want to talk about terrorism, why not start with the torture
    chambers in Yemen
    Or the occupation of Egypt as if the British rule in Iraq was some kind of
    heaven
    Cause history can be amazing, but I guess it depends who those books belong
    to
    Cause it’s easy to criticize other nations, when most of their problems
    were placed there by you

    The effects of colonialism are still ripe, cause even as I sit down to write
    Little girls continue to bleach their skin in hopes of one day looking white
    Put us in your common wealth, but amongst us wealth is not that common
    You gave us loans to rebuild our lands, but from a cost we never wanted
    They teach us to assimilate, like freeing little monkeys from their cage
    They think they’re doing us a favor by becoming new slaves of minimum wage
    Cause these western nations have blood on their hands of generations who’ve
    come to haunt
    And they keep trying to whitewash their crimes with political bleach but it
    still ain’t coming off
    And they want us to go back to where we came from, like an adopted child
    they no longer want
    But you’re the ones who crept into our beds, molested us and now you don`t
    know what to do with us

    Cause when Iraq was invaded, in search of weapons of mass destruction
    A power vacuum was created, to fulfill western oil consumption
    But now look what you’ve created, another failed attempt at the white man’s
    burden
    Of colonizing nations, imperialism used to civilize the savage

    And you don’t have to be racist to benefit from institutionalized racism
    But I know and I get it, it’s not your fault that you were born deprived of
    melanin
    But facts are facts and sadly history does tend to repeat itself
    Muslims didn’t invent terrorism, in fact we’ve been getting terrorized more
    than anybody else

    But I think we can all agree, that we just want to stop all the killing
    But if TV has taught me anything, it’s that there are no Heroes without
    villains
    It used to be the Germans, and the Russians for a bit,
    The Japanese once had it bad, and black people have never really gotten
    over it
    So I guess maybe it’s just Islam’s turn to be the enemy
    But I don’t want to be the enemy, it’s hard enough just being me
    A black, African, son of a refugee Muslim living in a culture that is
    extremely hostile towards me

    But in in the interest of the common good, we must play the cards that we
    are dealt
    So I’m taking this one for the team, cause Steve Segal ain’t going to fight
    himself
    So say goodnight to the bad guy, I know I will be missed
    But it’s the last time you ever going to see a bad guy like this

    13
    Boonaa Mohammed

    Copyright © 2014 Boonaa Mohammed | All rights reserved

    Reply
  • Jack Folan 1 year ago

    #BetterThanDrumpf #BetterThanShillary

    Reply
  • awill891 1 year ago

    I loves me some ices especially in this hot summer heat

    Reply
  • samweller96 1 year ago

    This guy could be the most qualified.

    Reply
  • Natasa Tran 1 year ago

    I feel dumber

    Reply
  • Craig Dawson 1 year ago

    I’ve literally been waiting for Tim Calhoun clips for years. SNL classic!

    Reply
  • Zachary Robertson 1 year ago

    I need a Tim Calhoun shirt

    Reply
  • Oscar Ramirez 1 year ago

    I’ll vote for him

    Reply
  • John Jones 1 year ago

    Is this an Asmr video?

    Reply
  • CultureCrash 1 year ago

    Sounds like a crappy ASMR video off YouTube.

    Reply
  • vcarter0723 1 year ago

    I am also pro-ices! Especially in the summer!

    Reply
  • Nough A. 1 year ago

    sounds like my 4 y.o nephew when he wants to tell me a secret #wetears ?

    Reply
  • Canaan 1 year ago

    more honest than Hillary less crazy than trump Tim Calhoun might be an
    option

    Reply
  • Timothy McSwain (timmc94) 1 year ago

    Still better than Trump and Clinton! How about we all write-in Will Forte
    for President?!

    Reply
  • Verena 1 year ago

    Fuck Donald Trump

    Reply
  • Wanthaza Mughogho 1 year ago

    hahahahhaa

    Reply
  • Donald Duck 1 year ago

    You know who would be the best presidential candidate?

    MacGRUBER!!!!!!!!!!?

    Reply
  • MMGabrielle 1 year ago

    Omg, long time Tim Calhoun supporter. This was a joy

    Reply

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