After 27 years of marriage Melinda & Bill Gates have decided to part ways, the FDA is expected to authorize the use of the Pfizer vaccine for children ages 12 to 15, Star Wars Day is being celebrated around the world and since tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo we came up with a special character to honor both days, Jimmy interviews Luke Skywalker’s hand, we look at the difference between Dr. Fauci working for Trump vs working for Joe Biden, and since roughly 26% of Americans are planning to skip the vaccine altogether, we asked some real doctors and nurses to offer their best advice to those who are on the fence.
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What the hell is polio???
ReplyCan we start a gofundme to pay for these guy’s student loans? This is too sad to hear!!
ReplyBill’s an idiot! Letting go a wonderful person who has sculpted his mean behavior into a tempered and philandrophistic person must have taken a toll on Melinda. It’s too sad that they had to part ways!
ReplyI happened to turn on The View this morning and they were talking about the Gates. They were saying how Melinda knew about Bill having an affair for 10 years.
ReplyBy far the best Kimmel segment in years, your writers killed it Jimmy!
ReplyMay all ignorant-know-it-alls watch the medical professionals ad on this show and finally get the vaccine!!! That was hilarious and sooo necessary!
ReplyI must be jimmy’s uncle Frank!
ReplyWhy did they bother. Just live in one of their homes. Or, is one of them having an affair and wants to marry the bit on the side.
ReplyI loved Star Wars. I was amazed at The Empire Strikes Back. I was a bit nonplussed with the cash grab of Return of the Jedi. And I passionately hate Phantom Menace. So much so that the entire Star Wars universe is dead to me now. All of it. Every little last bit.
ReplyVaccine hesitants wouldn’t watch Jimmy Kimmel live. They would watch hannity or tucker Carlson
ReplyHey! That wasn’t “brought to (me)” by “people smarter than (me)” meaning the doctors. They meant the makers/producers of the show…
fup off
ReplyI hope they post a separate video of the doctors’ segment. Many around the world need it
Replywhoever wrote the star wars monologue jokes needs a raise
ReplyChewbaccamole?…. more like Chewbacca zombie after taking vaccine loaded with tracking bleach
ReplyWhere are ANITTA’s performance?
Replywhere is fauci interview
ReplyTo be entirely honest, at this point we should blur any part of the screen that shows Admiral Shitwit’s orange flesh. Just blur him out like a rude gesture or wayward testicle.
ReplyThey forgot about the most famous Fauchi moment during the Trump Administration. His face Palm summed up those 4 years perfectly!
Replyso may the 4th was the ed balls day of its time. way to go britain
ReplyElla so young
ReplyHallelujah!
ReplyGates getting divorced is prophetic
ReplyThe vaccine PSA is pure gold – very well done, thank you!
ReplyJimmy if your going to introduce the kids to star wars in order of one thru the end your gonna have a long trip ahead of you.
ReplyGreat Commercial for the Vaccine!
ReplyMan that bit with Drs at the end… priceless.. sooo good…
Replyis jimmy ok? 0:26
ReplyYou need a star wars guide? Just go to comic con and shout “Who wants to talk to my kids about star wars”, and pick the weirdo of you choosing…
ReplyIs it just me or has the writer’s on the show taken a nosedive since trump left office? Rag on Geuermo or stupid af jokes that Jimmy plows through. Come on guys
ReplyGet the vaccine and get off Facebook.
ReplyI wonder if anti-vaxxers get shots for their dogs?
ReplyOr do the illuminati only care about shots that go into humans?
Fun fact: COVID-19 killed more Americans in one year than polio did in 250 years.
ReplyMan, those doctors :D.
But…. If someone did listen to fb or other useless media platform instead a doctor at the first place, no matter what you say they aren’t gonna listen to you even if you gather all the doctors and scientists in the world.
Kimmel, my man! You are beyond just being a talk show host.
ReplySee Jimmy, u can use language on this show, but not with Mark Rober
ReplyAnother one of those times it’s depressing that you can only hit the like button once..
ReplyShow ur kids episode one, they will like Jar Jar, then by the time I get to episode 4, they will be annoyed and he will be gone
ReplyMost doctors are obnoxious with over-inflated egos. I would rather listen to the scientists
ReplytRUMP was painfully useless on many levels~…
ReplyThe props department spent a hundred hours on that stupid outfit. Props to the props.
ReplyTake the last few minutes of the opening and make it into a commercial. Loved it.
Reply3,4,5 then 123. Watch in release order
ReplyThe doctors / nurses sequence is brilliant. Should be force fed (like in A Clockwork Orange) to all anti-vaxers.
ReplyI’ll be your guide young padwan
ReplyIn the race for the best, smartest US President in history, Donald Trump is stone motherless last.
ReplyEven Jimmy knew this was weak… meh.
Replythe Bill Gates bit was funny
ReplyI really wanted to move to California but me going there without any money would be crazy at the same time
ReplyI saw the first one back in the 70s. The idea of sequels repels me. You had your time at bat.
ReplyOoooop
ReplyMachete order is a unique way to watch the Star Wars saga. 4, 5, 2, 3, 6. Skip 1 since it’s filler compared to the others. I guess you could watch 7-9 afterwards.
ReplySo…as a “Family Affair”…May the “Force Kin” be with you…
ReplyFlan Solo? You passed up Juan Solo for that? I R disappoint.
ReplyJimmy please upload that Doctors telling to get the vaccine and let people share it on Facebook.
ReplyJimmy: your show is the best!
ReplyThe hypocrisy in US moral codes that they can present hate speech, show killings but have to fuzz out a finger. I thought they were just hypocritical over genitals but it seems a finger is morally dangerous as well .
ReplyGo figure that this nation actually thinks it’s tough and superior when it is deeply offended by a finger.
“then tell him to shut the f up” LMAO. She cracked me up. They ALL did. That was awesome.
ReplyCall Colbert Jimmy, he’ll help with the Star Wars dilemma!
Reply*It’s unfair on how things has turned up to be ever since the outbreak of covid 19 things hasn’t been like they seemed to be*
*we see complains here and there in the social Media from different people in different countries all around the world*
*Looks like the government care’s less OR aren’t making enough efforts anymore*
*I think we all should try to engage in different things to make money and stop hoping on the economy*
ReplyBill Gates, the guy who said we could reduce pollution down to zero if we reduced the population to zero.
ReplyMay the Lord be with you!
thank you for the laughs Jimmy ,keep up the good work and close to Guillermo
ReplyThey coulda have gone with Han Cholo, but hey, I won’t judge.
ReplyI was 9 too, Jimmy- same quandary!
Reply12:12 it realy looks like edited photo of Alexandra Daddario
ReplyRaw ginger doesn’t cure cancer but it taste great in warm water.
ReplyI love the doctor feature. Brilliant!
ReplyPleaseeee run that ad on TV =)
ReplyWho in their right mind would start a virus so they can control us!?? If this keeps up they won’t have anyone to control ,! ( except IDIOTS of course ,mm!?)
ReplyLook at Gates flexing with that EGA monitor in his Tinder profile…
ReplyHey open it up renters, let them join the Darwin awards,tRump has made me sick of stupid people, even myself…when I do something stupid I punch myself in the face
ReplyNot funny.
ReplyI love that doctor part that was so great. That should be a public announcement. With those people saying that
ReplyObviously Snoke was generated from the severed hand of Luke Skywalker. So yeah. We saw it again.
ReplyJimmy I will be your Star Wars spirit guide
ReplyThe chewy/guak thing could have been cut entirely. The vaccine advice from the docs could have been run twice it was so good.
ReplyI was waiting for the joke about Luke’s hand: (J) “How are you?” (H) “All right”
ReplyI like how people put up “I want to know what’s in it” about the vaccine, like if there were an ingredients list on the vial, they would be able to make any sense of it. “Oh… potassium ascorbate… I see.” Man, until you can understand the ingredients list of breakfast cereal, just stop it.
ReplyThe paper clip in Microsoft Word kept me sane all through high school and college. All those essays!
ReplyIt’s cool ABC can go all in on Star Wars now lol
ReplyAmen! Get the f*cking vaccine!
ReplyThe health care experts’ segment couldn’t have been better. Screw the writers today, ok, Chubacamole was alright.
ReplyYes, please, get the vaccine. The more human guinea pigs that do, the more accurate the science will be, when it finally comes in.
In the meantime, I’ll just keep social distancing. Hell, I’ve been doing it happily for over a decade now, and see no reason to change that now.
I’ll just stay out of everybody’s way, (as usual), and let the guinea pigs and the scientists work it out amongst themselves, (though I am interested to see the results, once enough time has passed to actually get them).
Me and and the critters’ll be just fine. We’re all organic, free range, and out of range.
Good luck with all that.
ReplySupport BIG pharma and help them & the elites get richer! Accept Bill Gates as your Lord and savior and allow them to inject his chemical soup operating system into you. Never mind the numerous horrible side effects and people dying from it. Just do as your told sheep!
ReplyPlot twist: they’re the same person
Replythe vaccine messed up my & my girlfriends periods. that is my proof. I listen to my body first.
ReplyI’ve seen all the star wars content, hit me up I’ll make you a guide lol
ReplyShow you kids the clone wars show on Disney plus and rebels Kimmel. Those shows got me into star wars
Reply10:47 ok so why the hell don’t the doctor’s get the vaccine ? Not one doctor has had the vaccine NOT one !
ReplyThat doctor’s section was life!
ReplyAMERICAN FRONTLINE DOCTORS can tell everyone the true facts on the Covid vaccine. So sweet of Kimmel be sooooo concerned about his audience, listeners and followers.
ReplyI just loved that Chinese doctor … she can check me out in bed anytime!
Reply“Flan Solo”
ReplyI was going to guess “Han Quesolo”, but whatever
Thank you Jimmy and team fit reminding us we have chosen to live in a male driven world and will live in ongoing cycles of puberty until we allow the nurturing female power.
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