COVID-19 Animal Rescue: Recieved a distress Signal yesterday. The Carribou grazing the Artic Tunrdra were getting Strung out from All this Social Distancing Stuff. I thought we had HERD Immunity.

Thank’s again People! Luv ya -aka Charlie B’ outta Dobbs Ferry N.Y.

I needed this SO much rite now. I love both of you and I adore John Oliver but I just watched both of his episodes on the police and mail in voting and my fucking blood pressure was off the charts in a good way because that’s how it should be but I’m telling you what it’s been rough coming down from that and that was hours ago but we need you guys to make us think and to make us laugh so thank you both for both of those things a fucking Chia pet how the fuck did you find a fucking chia pet John Oliver

What a wonderful citizen we’ve gained in John Oliver! His last Last Week Tonight is a must-watch, showing a history many may not know concerning police in America.

I’d rather stick a quarter down his ass crack than see him tie his shoes via British standards

An actual legit laugh from Jimmy.

Congratulations on being an American citizen but why in the world do you act like you were entitled to citizenship? Because you lived in the nation for a while? That’s not how life works

Look up the case of william dungey vs joseph spencer…ABRAHAM LINCOLN WAS DUNGEYS ATTORNEY..Then look up DREDD SCOTT case.

Why is this a toy ? ROFL smart kid

Would either of you be interested in a story about a college? I would love to tell it and maybe the rest of the world needs to hear it.

How the hell is the audio out of sync?

Hilarious

Of all the things that have been done to chia seeds this is by far the worst

Jesus! The Estelle Getty Chia Pet with the pitiful vegetation looks EXACTLY like Trump! 3:57!

John’s Covid19 long hair is looking HOT 😍

Thanks for making me laugh! I really needed that.

Jimmy sounds really bad

Professor Duncan, for those who know.

I wouldn’t want to become an American citizen even if they paid me. The place has too many Americans.

They made it hell for my mother. Took her 5 years just for them to recognize the US citizenship and her Mother is 100% American. Unfortunately my Grandmother never bothered to register my Mother at birth since she was living in a foreign country at the time.

Chia pet is 2020 in a nut shell

Did Trump get his “campaign check” yet John? 🤓🤓🤓

https://youtu.be/aDtxAzleH7g

These two should meet every week online.

such surprising John just became American, it would be more funny for his show!

Ha! Now we really get to keep John Oliver.

Johnny get a hair transplant. That toupe is an abomination.

Another addition to the ranks of the pure-bred, white, privileged hypocrites. Welcome!

I don’t get what was so hard about it for him.. I’m sure I was in a pretty similar situation, and I wouldn’t consider it a difficult process at all, all things considered.

Dont vote democrat.

they can’t buy good microphones?

Thanks #johnoliver + #cnbc + #cnn + #youngturks for the #infiniteinsults of #politicalidiocy #saveyourpennies for the #infinitology of #snapchange https://youtu.be/5245W-C34JU

Skin color helped you out alot john

Omg. We have that chia pet! 🤣🤣🤣

2/3 of American born citizens cannot pass a citizenship test. Can you imagine how bad black Americans would test? I’d say that 80% couldn’t pass one.

When I was in ROTC the commander separated the citizens and non citizens. Non citizens went out to play ball and citizens were made to take a citizenship test. That test is really difficult and I would compare them to the literacy tests that people of color were forced to take in order to vote. The point of this was to hopefully make us appreciate how lucky we were.

Erdington U.K. to USA

Awesome!

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