A farmer with an underperforming rooster decided to try giving the bird some viagra one evening. The next morning he went out to the barn yard to find every one of the hens dead. He saw that vultures had started circling above and then he saw the rooster, who was also dead. Now he was stumped and started swearing, but before he got two words out the rooster open his eyes, pointed up and said “Shhh.”
Yes .. Joe Biden and Kamal Harris america… border crisis’s… unemployment…gas shortage… lumber shortage… chicken wings shortage… middle east on fire… bill Maher with vaccine gets covid-19
I asked my 18 year old if he remembered fog horn leghorn in the cartoons I had him watch as a kid. He said yes. As he got old enough to hold a phone I would put the old cartoons on I use to watch. Those times he watched and laughing out loud at them was music to my ears
The problem is that they select one chicken, and clone it. So now they have thousands of roosters they do not care for.
They will kill every single male, and they may not even be used for consumption. The industrial farming practices in the US are truly horrific. The people whom work with chicken abuse them mercilessly.
I think roosters have figured out that their cocking around is underappreciated by the hens. Essentially the roosters took the red pill and decided that they have other more important things to do than satisfy women.
I’m happy for the roosters, they deserved some time to themselves to pursue their own hobbies, dreams, and careers without having to provide for a bunch of ungrateful, overbearing hens.
The biggest problem of the war vehicles offered by technology is the legitimation of the bombing of the civilian population. I think the Geneva convention should be reconsidered and the precautionary and criminal clauses related to how to limit the use of this new war technology should be determined. or it forces to be a party. So it doesn’t allow it to be yourself either. This should be considered a major crime. Action must be taken immediately, as a war crime has been committed.
It seems to me that the old wars (the time when advanced technology was not developed) were more honest now … The civilian people were not on the battlefields, they were passing between armed soldiers.
Dear Mr. Pederson,
I know you will do the right thing. Thanks in advance, Old School
Here are the answers to Man’s oldest questions.
Q: How did we get here?
A: Meoisis (Reproductive Cell Division)
Q: Why are we here?
A: To install HOPE onto others
Q: What came first, the Chicken or the egg?
A: The egg came first
Once upon a time, there was a little Blue Planet way out in the middle of nowhere. This little Planet was just out of reach for any life to begin. God took notice and asked Mother Nature if she could help. Mother Nature took on the challenge. After assessing the situation, she realized she was going to need help.
She said, “Sir, does the little plant have a name?”
“Not yet”
“How the does Earth sound?”
“That means Ground, Right?”
“That’s right”
“I love it”
“Did you find the assistance who were looking for”
“Yes Sir, I have a young lady that I have been looking for an opportunity for her to shine. We will called her Mother Earth.”
“Perfect”
While Mother Earth was getting familiar with her new home, Mother Nature was deciding what do to get a Earth little warmer. Since Earth was a little cold, she decided to thin the Earth’s Ozone layer just enough to raise the temperature one tenth of one percent, over the next 100 or so years.
Meanwhile, Mother Earth notice little Fungi looking stuff all over and it was shivering. Over time she noticed the Fungi was moving closer and closer together trying to stay warm. Over the next 100 years or so, the Earth slowing got warmer until one day the Fungi touch each other in that special way. For the next millions of years the Fungi tried to figure how.
Mother Nature took notice and said, “That seems to be doing the trick, let’s thin just a skoosh more. Another millions go by and Earth it’s has first egg. However, unfortunately is was a dud. Once again for millions of years nothing but dud eggs. Mother Nature said, “Just a tad more”
And yet one more time, time goes by a suddenly one day Pooph, the first chicken. Oh, what’s that? Our first Rooster.
There you have, makes perfect sense to me.
Old School
Dear Jimmy and Company,
I am a 64-year-old life-long pot-smoking white boy and a HUGH FAN. So sue me. Sorry, but I would not be Progressive enough for you guys. When does the Audience get back?
I apologize ahead of time Jimmy, but God needs YOU to be of one my conduits to the Globe. WAIT, before you start mind fucking yourself to tears about the whole “Why Me” thing. Here is why, I have several now, and the ONE thing we all have in common is when we say “I DO NOT GIVE A FUCK!” We are the “ONLY ONES THAT ACTALLY MEAN IT.” Just be yourself, slow everything down, and act like YOU own the joint. I know for a fact you have the stones to do it.
So, let us do this. I have a segment for you, maybe two, your call.
Let us get Glen Greenwald on with you to walk through all of this amazing shit. We need to go Global.
Thanks in Advance, Old School
4 of 5
Okay World,
It is time for “ALL” of you to “Check Your Egos in at the Door and Expand Your Comfort Zone.”
The World is already starting to change, can you feel it?”
Genuinely Yours, Old School
P.S. Melissa M., thank you SO much for your understanding and commitment. I very much look forward working with you in the future.
The Earth is now “Officially in the loop with God.” I am just the Massager.
Regards, Old School
4 of 5
Most Honorable First Lady,
Dear Melania,
I find you to be the epitome of style and grace. If I was your Dad, there would not be a hat big enough. Thank You very much for everything.
I just want to give you guys a heads up, the World is about to change BIG TIME.
Please share this with my “Favorite President of ALL Time.”
Respectfully, Old School
P.S. Say hi to Baron for me, did he get tall or what.
Cc: Don Jr., Eric, Ivanka, Van Jones, God
Dear Mr. President,
Hello Sir, it is I; Old School, just checking in to see if everybody is doing okay today. I realize that was a mouth full yesterday. This time I want to, humbling request, your badly needed help. The World is in big trouble and everybody knows it, especially the kids.
Here is what I need you to do. Talk to the other World Leaders, and tell them what your new vision for American entails. By the way, you might suggest the following.
1. Slow Our Roll
2. Just be courteous
3. Remember the Meiosis process is what got us here.
4. The reason why we are here is to instill HOPE onto others.
Start up a “Let’s Stop the Malarkey” campaign. Headed up by very our Vice President Kamal Harris, Assisted by Nancy and Chuck. Establish deliverables, milestones, expectations, and goals.
Enough with the Russia Gate, and January 6 misinformation campaign created the Media debacles. I would the spank the daylights out of them.
LOSE your current Press Secretary; she is NOT serving you well. Do NOT listen to anybody.
********888
5 of 5
Please, for the love God, stop dangling carrots. Nearly all of the, so called, “Big Hitters” are unachievable and always have been. You know this to be self-evident.
So go to your office, close the door, tell everyone you need a few minutes, and invite Jesus into your heart. Get comfortable and think about all of the great Presidents that sat right where you are now. Some of which had a much bigger fish to fry.
Let us start easy, but we need to “WAKE THE WOKE” if you know what I mean.
Make up with Trump, we are going to need him as well. In Fact, start there. He can help you significantly; the majority of America will understand and respect that.
Joseph, I want you to know that Old School here has your back 100%. If you ever need anything, do not hesitate to contact me. In addition, I know a for fact, all of your dearly departed want you to be a really great President.
Yours Truly, Old School
P.S. I know it goes without saying, because I know, in my heart, you are a Man of your word. However, I expect SOME movement by the end of next week or I am going public. Your move Chief.
Hello Mr. President,
Old School here, hope all is well. Have you given any through as to how we will be going forward? I have.
Here is what I purpose:
Let us meet in your office with our V.P., Speaker, and Majority Leader. I want three reporters, one PBS, one BBC, and one Sky news. We will firmly limit it to an half an hour, and we will do it LIVE (No Exceptions). The World needs, the World DESIRES to see this. YOU OWE TO IT THEM, YOU OWE TO IT TO KIDS. I plan to tell them the story about God and Mother Nature rescued Earth.
I strongly suggest we make this happen, what could hurt? Besides, I know for a fact the World is buzzing already, but everybody is a little nervous. They do not call it a “Leap of Faith” for nothing, Joe.
I will expect a response, phone call 707-567-5958, from you or your staff by close business Monday or I will be forced to re-think my position. This will be the first time I will being giving God bad news. He have no idea what he is capable of, PLEASE let us not find out.
Regards, Old School
Things to remember about God, THIS IS NO B.S.. He is not playing around. He has the World on mute. He does care one bit about our shenanigans, they mean less than nothing to him. He is sick and frustrated about Russian Gate, he does thing Vladimir desires all this grief. I agree. Lastly, GOD IS NOT ASKING FOR MUCH. Again I agree.
Hello Mr. President,
Old School here, hope all is well. Have you given any through as to how we will be going forward? I have.
Here is what I purpose:
Let us meet in your office with our V.P., Speaker, and Majority Leader. I want three reporters, one PBS, one BBC, and one Sky news. We will firmly limit it to an half an hour, and we will do it LIVE (No Exceptions). The World needs, the World DESIRES to see this. YOU OWE TO IT THEM, YOU OWE TO IT TO KIDS. I plan to tell them the story about God and Mother Nature rescued Earth.
I strongly suggest we make this happen, what could hurt? Besides, I know for a fact the World is buzzing already, but everybody is a little nervous. They do not call it a “Leap of Faith” for nothing, Joe.
I will expect a response, phone call 707-567-5958, from you or your staff by close business Monday or I will be forced to re-think my position. This will be the first time I will being giving God bad news. He have no idea what he is capable of, PLEASE let us not find out.
Regards, Old School
P.S. Things to remember about God, THIS IS NO B.S.. He is not playing around. He has the World on mute. He does care one bit about our shenanigans, they mean less than nothing to him. He is sick and frustrated about Russian Gate, he does thing Vladimir desires all this grief. I agree. Lastly, GOD IS NOT ASKING FOR MUCH. Again, I agree.
I didn’t see any price changes on chicken at my Walmart…which is good news. If the price is up, I will just try to cut down on chicken, buy turkey sausage instead.
“The Happy Looster Rooster”.
ReplyI’m betting the chicken shortage has a lot more to do with deregulation & tons of factory workers getting Covid.
ReplyI say I say it’s a time to make sum eggs
ReplyI can do a better Leghorn Foghorn voice
ReplyAbsolute GOLD!!!
ReplySo ole Foggy has to take some little blue corn kernels.
ReplyJumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon with a cape on
ReplyAnd beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn
Everybody knows that you need 2 bathtubs, too… ;-P
ReplyThat Foghorn voice was absolutely, I say, absolutely terrible!
ReplyIf “Leghorn” ain’t a euphemism, I say I don’t, I don’t, I don’t know what is!
ReplyPicked the wrong genetically altered rooster.
ReplyJumped in a Chickenhawk cartoon with a cape on
ReplyAnd beat up Foghorn Leghorn with an acorn
Well maybe if big agri-business didn’t go so big on monoculture.
Reply“I’m not joking.” I wish she was.
ReplyPeople, time to go Vegan ya’ll!!,..
ReplyA farmer with an underperforming rooster decided to try giving the bird some viagra one evening. The next morning he went out to the barn yard to find every one of the hens dead. He saw that vultures had started circling above and then he saw the rooster, who was also dead. Now he was stumped and started swearing, but before he got two words out the rooster open his eyes, pointed up and said “Shhh.”
ReplyI can’t believe you missed a chance to play the jingle about your weenie not working if you don’t get the vaccine.
ReplyShit hits the fan in Palestine
ReplyTrevor Noah: let’s talk about it
Stephen colbert: i’m blind
I’m not american, but I follow american politics closely. now, I finally understand why people call john kennedy foghorn leghorn. 😀
ReplyT shirts on sale now
ReplyThank you Brian Stack. 💜
ReplySince this is a long-term effect of Covid-19, maybe all the birds got sick.
ReplyCheers to whoever came up with this. Hilarious
ReplyYes .. Joe Biden and Kamal Harris america… border crisis’s… unemployment…gas shortage… lumber shortage… chicken wings shortage… middle east on fire… bill Maher with vaccine gets covid-19
Reply“Fog” is the last thing I’d want in my horn …… 🤣
But that could be a metaphor. 😉
ReplyOh, I loved this!
ReplyHahaha that was funny! 🐓😊 I guess I take alot more for granted than I should, like everywhere a chickchick. 🐣🐥🐣🐤🐣🐣🐥🐣🐤🐣🐤🐥🐣Dang….🤨
ReplySounds like a little steroids would help.
ReplyOh look, it’s Senator John Kennedy.
ReplyUnderperforming rooster Stephen Colbert news awesomeness job opportunity
ReplyTime to embrace a vegetarian diet.
ReplyI. ..I ..,I KEEPS ONA PITCHIŃ’EⓂ️ BUT SHE KEEPS ONA MISSIŃ’E〽️., 🔍🤔maybe try a different position 🤗🙌🏼
ReplyAbsolute genius! This was a great cartoon growing up
Replyhahaha, it’s funny because the chicks they didn’t have would have been killed anyway hilarious I love it
ReplyThis is actually fucking halarious
ReplySomething, something… connection between monocrops, food shortages, and famines…
ReplyWhen the sketch plotline wasn’t far off from the original one.
ReplyI asked my 18 year old if he remembered fog horn leghorn in the cartoons I had him watch as a kid. He said yes. As he got old enough to hold a phone I would put the old cartoons on I use to watch. Those times he watched and laughing out loud at them was music to my ears
ReplyThat one company’s choice can affect the supply market so much is a sign of antitrust regulation needed in Big Agro
Reply😆🐓
ReplyThey should just got down to Key West there are ton of them down there.
ReplyHow positively odd… the human statistics says the same thing.
ReplyLowest birth rate in a decade.
i am sure this is obama’s fault somehow. thanks obama for running my run on KFC last night.
ReplyLmao
ReplyThose roosters liked Barbra Streisand and showtunes
ReplyBirds just have a cloaca, Stephen.
ReplyShould have used a Lindsey Graham voice.
ReplyThe problem is that they select one chicken, and clone it. So now they have thousands of roosters they do not care for.
They will kill every single male, and they may not even be used for consumption. The industrial farming practices in the US are truly horrific. The people whom work with chicken abuse them mercilessly.
ReplyWow. Something almost funny.
ReplyBetter fire that guy, don’t want people to think this is comedy show.
what u know about clemente son
Replyplus checkens dont need roasters to make eggs jackasses
Replybut they do need them to make chicks what a trip huh lol
ReplyYou have to just make a story up when your profiteering during a pandemic.
ReplyAbsolutely brilliant
ReplyGlad to see Foghorn making a comeback. He should fit right into America’s 2021 society.
ReplyHaaaaaaaaaaaa haaaaaa haaaqaw haaaa who did THIS ??? Haaaaaa
ReplyI think roosters have figured out that their cocking around is underappreciated by the hens. Essentially the roosters took the red pill and decided that they have other more important things to do than satisfy women.
ReplyI’m happy for the roosters, they deserved some time to themselves to pursue their own hobbies, dreams, and careers without having to provide for a bunch of ungrateful, overbearing hens.
👍
ReplyCock jokes… Really Stephen? Don’t make me pull out the big 🔫 against you friend
ReplyOMG—I haven’t thought about Foghorn Leghorn in DECADES…😂😂😂…I guess I’m a fossil!!!!!!!
ReplyPoultryalis HAHA!
ReplyDon’t eat chickens. End speciesism. 🌱
ReplyTerrible job on the voice.
ReplyThe biggest problem of the war vehicles offered by technology is the legitimation of the bombing of the civilian population. I think the Geneva convention should be reconsidered and the precautionary and criminal clauses related to how to limit the use of this new war technology should be determined. or it forces to be a party. So it doesn’t allow it to be yourself either. This should be considered a major crime. Action must be taken immediately, as a war crime has been committed.
ReplyIt seems to me that the old wars (the time when advanced technology was not developed) were more honest now … The civilian people were not on the battlefields, they were passing between armed soldiers.
How can rooster do their job when confined and fed nothing good, human?
ReplyI imagine he’s not feeling any amour for American matings rituals these days after seeing what Pepe is going through
Reply“There’s not a lot of #fog left in my horn!”
ReplySomeone give that writer a *RAISE*
I wouldn’t be surprised if Tyson actually uses some of this material in their advertising period, in order to explain the rise in the cost of chicken
ReplyI feel that this was a role Brian Stack was born to play! 😂
ReplyGuarantee you one thing…. Foghorn Leghorn. Is no fucking progressive liberal..
ReplyHi Steven
,
Get ready, Old School
Dear Mr. Pederson,
I know you will do the right thing. Thanks in advance, Old School
Here are the answers to Man’s oldest questions.
Q: How did we get here?
A: Meoisis (Reproductive Cell Division)
Q: Why are we here?
A: To install HOPE onto others
Q: What came first, the Chicken or the egg?
A: The egg came first
Once upon a time, there was a little Blue Planet way out in the middle of nowhere. This little Planet was just out of reach for any life to begin. God took notice and asked Mother Nature if she could help. Mother Nature took on the challenge. After assessing the situation, she realized she was going to need help.
She said, “Sir, does the little plant have a name?”
“Not yet”
“How the does Earth sound?”
“That means Ground, Right?”
“That’s right”
“I love it”
“Did you find the assistance who were looking for”
“Yes Sir, I have a young lady that I have been looking for an opportunity for her to shine. We will called her Mother Earth.”
“Perfect”
While Mother Earth was getting familiar with her new home, Mother Nature was deciding what do to get a Earth little warmer. Since Earth was a little cold, she decided to thin the Earth’s Ozone layer just enough to raise the temperature one tenth of one percent, over the next 100 or so years.
Meanwhile, Mother Earth notice little Fungi looking stuff all over and it was shivering. Over time she noticed the Fungi was moving closer and closer together trying to stay warm. Over the next 100 years or so, the Earth slowing got warmer until one day the Fungi touch each other in that special way. For the next millions of years the Fungi tried to figure how.
Mother Nature took notice and said, “That seems to be doing the trick, let’s thin just a skoosh more. Another millions go by and Earth it’s has first egg. However, unfortunately is was a dud. Once again for millions of years nothing but dud eggs. Mother Nature said, “Just a tad more”
And yet one more time, time goes by a suddenly one day Pooph, the first chicken. Oh, what’s that? Our first Rooster.
There you have, makes perfect sense to me.
Old School
Dear Jimmy and Company,
I am a 64-year-old life-long pot-smoking white boy and a HUGH FAN. So sue me. Sorry, but I would not be Progressive enough for you guys. When does the Audience get back?
I apologize ahead of time Jimmy, but God needs YOU to be of one my conduits to the Globe. WAIT, before you start mind fucking yourself to tears about the whole “Why Me” thing. Here is why, I have several now, and the ONE thing we all have in common is when we say “I DO NOT GIVE A FUCK!” We are the “ONLY ONES THAT ACTALLY MEAN IT.” Just be yourself, slow everything down, and act like YOU own the joint. I know for a fact you have the stones to do it.
So, let us do this. I have a segment for you, maybe two, your call.
Let us get Glen Greenwald on with you to walk through all of this amazing shit. We need to go Global.
Thanks in Advance, Old School
4 of 5
Okay World,
It is time for “ALL” of you to “Check Your Egos in at the Door and Expand Your Comfort Zone.”
The World is already starting to change, can you feel it?”
Genuinely Yours, Old School
P.S. Melissa M., thank you SO much for your understanding and commitment. I very much look forward working with you in the future.
The Earth is now “Officially in the loop with God.” I am just the Massager.
Regards, Old School
4 of 5
Most Honorable First Lady,
Dear Melania,
I find you to be the epitome of style and grace. If I was your Dad, there would not be a hat big enough. Thank You very much for everything.
I just want to give you guys a heads up, the World is about to change BIG TIME.
Please share this with my “Favorite President of ALL Time.”
Respectfully, Old School
P.S. Say hi to Baron for me, did he get tall or what.
Cc: Don Jr., Eric, Ivanka, Van Jones, God
Dear Mr. President,
Hello Sir, it is I; Old School, just checking in to see if everybody is doing okay today. I realize that was a mouth full yesterday. This time I want to, humbling request, your badly needed help. The World is in big trouble and everybody knows it, especially the kids.
Here is what I need you to do. Talk to the other World Leaders, and tell them what your new vision for American entails. By the way, you might suggest the following.
1. Slow Our Roll
2. Just be courteous
3. Remember the Meiosis process is what got us here.
4. The reason why we are here is to instill HOPE onto others.
Start up a “Let’s Stop the Malarkey” campaign. Headed up by very our Vice President Kamal Harris, Assisted by Nancy and Chuck. Establish deliverables, milestones, expectations, and goals.
Enough with the Russia Gate, and January 6 misinformation campaign created the Media debacles. I would the spank the daylights out of them.
LOSE your current Press Secretary; she is NOT serving you well. Do NOT listen to anybody.
********888
5 of 5
Please, for the love God, stop dangling carrots. Nearly all of the, so called, “Big Hitters” are unachievable and always have been. You know this to be self-evident.
So go to your office, close the door, tell everyone you need a few minutes, and invite Jesus into your heart. Get comfortable and think about all of the great Presidents that sat right where you are now. Some of which had a much bigger fish to fry.
Let us start easy, but we need to “WAKE THE WOKE” if you know what I mean.
Make up with Trump, we are going to need him as well. In Fact, start there. He can help you significantly; the majority of America will understand and respect that.
Joseph, I want you to know that Old School here has your back 100%. If you ever need anything, do not hesitate to contact me. In addition, I know a for fact, all of your dearly departed want you to be a really great President.
Yours Truly, Old School
P.S. I know it goes without saying, because I know, in my heart, you are a Man of your word. However, I expect SOME movement by the end of next week or I am going public. Your move Chief.
Hello Mr. President,
Old School here, hope all is well. Have you given any through as to how we will be going forward? I have.
Here is what I purpose:
Let us meet in your office with our V.P., Speaker, and Majority Leader. I want three reporters, one PBS, one BBC, and one Sky news. We will firmly limit it to an half an hour, and we will do it LIVE (No Exceptions). The World needs, the World DESIRES to see this. YOU OWE TO IT THEM, YOU OWE TO IT TO KIDS. I plan to tell them the story about God and Mother Nature rescued Earth.
I strongly suggest we make this happen, what could hurt? Besides, I know for a fact the World is buzzing already, but everybody is a little nervous. They do not call it a “Leap of Faith” for nothing, Joe.
I will expect a response, phone call 707-567-5958, from you or your staff by close business Monday or I will be forced to re-think my position. This will be the first time I will being giving God bad news. He have no idea what he is capable of, PLEASE let us not find out.
Regards, Old School
Things to remember about God, THIS IS NO B.S.. He is not playing around. He has the World on mute. He does care one bit about our shenanigans, they mean less than nothing to him. He is sick and frustrated about Russian Gate, he does thing Vladimir desires all this grief. I agree. Lastly, GOD IS NOT ASKING FOR MUCH. Again I agree.
Hello Mr. President,
ReplyOld School here, hope all is well. Have you given any through as to how we will be going forward? I have.
Here is what I purpose:
Let us meet in your office with our V.P., Speaker, and Majority Leader. I want three reporters, one PBS, one BBC, and one Sky news. We will firmly limit it to an half an hour, and we will do it LIVE (No Exceptions). The World needs, the World DESIRES to see this. YOU OWE TO IT THEM, YOU OWE TO IT TO KIDS. I plan to tell them the story about God and Mother Nature rescued Earth.
I strongly suggest we make this happen, what could hurt? Besides, I know for a fact the World is buzzing already, but everybody is a little nervous. They do not call it a “Leap of Faith” for nothing, Joe.
I will expect a response, phone call 707-567-5958, from you or your staff by close business Monday or I will be forced to re-think my position. This will be the first time I will being giving God bad news. He have no idea what he is capable of, PLEASE let us not find out.
Regards, Old School
P.S. Things to remember about God, THIS IS NO B.S.. He is not playing around. He has the World on mute. He does care one bit about our shenanigans, they mean less than nothing to him. He is sick and frustrated about Russian Gate, he does thing Vladimir desires all this grief. I agree. Lastly, GOD IS NOT ASKING FOR MUCH. Again, I agree.
I didn’t see any price changes on chicken at my Walmart…which is good news. If the price is up, I will just try to cut down on chicken, buy turkey sausage instead.
Reply